I should know this

14 and a half years into this relationship with Dave, I should know when it's coming but nope. Not a clue. The guy has the dryest sense of humor on earth.Playing Wii baseball waiting on the countdown to hit our time zone and the kids have him playing baseball with us.I got to first base and the kids were ribbing me about not making it past first base.......Anyone want to guess where perv went with this one?At least he's whispering these things now, cause the kids are getting on up in age.......

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New Year's At My House

There is something to be said about having the family that I have. There are no babysitters, no drunken parties, no cab rides home. Nope, that's not how we ring in the New Year. H4G's special ribs (the secret is in the glaze/rub combo), purple hull peas bubbling on the stove with some bacon and onions, the fixings for potato salad in the making and a pecan pie (GF of course) on standby. We eat until I gain back the 2 lbs I lost this past week on vacay, and then we sit and rub out bellies playing Train until midnight when we'll play Wii and sip our apple juice till we all pass out in a holiday...

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The Big T

We love Tulsa. It's where we met, fell in love and eventually married before the Navy took us away. We've been back for visits, in fact we were there all of Monday this past week catching up with everyone we still know there. It was wonderful to see everyone and sit/catch-up while the kids ran wild. We ended up driving around at 1 in the morning after the last visit. We drove by his old house, my old house, our meeting place: the Shell station that used to be a Texico. We drove by the bridge I'd walk everyday, a few places we both worked and mainly we realized that while it holds a certain appeal,...

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I'm Home....and going into hiding

We made it home. Finally, and I'm beat. But oh boy the stories I'll have to share with my peeps in the coming week.Except now, I am waiting on Dave to finish pecos fries and then it's off to the tub. Then a coma.This is my fav pic from this trip. Dave and I were trying to figure out what we were gonna do next and I love the whole heads together shot Princess took of us from the backseat. This really says alot about me and my guy. Love that man, even if I want to run him over with my car somedays,...

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Hello Lake

I've missed you.We made it to the lake for the holidays. The drive was great, we arrived at 3 am Christmas morning and other than not being able to find an open bathroom for 200 miles at a stretch due to everyone being closed, it was uneventful and good family time. Now Dave has a big ole smile on his face and everyone is relaxed and happy.Merry Christmas to all!We are enjoying our time together. Hugs to you a...

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Crap!

The kid is now cooler than me..... she got a kindle from my mom (hey, I got her a netbook....I get points) and she's downloading books left and right for free. I have the ancient old sony e-reader and there aren't any (excuse me, AINT any) free books around. Sniff. I want a nook.Dear Santa,Before next year, I better have a nice new nook under my tree to feed my reading slut novel addiction.Love...

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Deep Breath

So I've been super busy. Today is my last day as your friendly local Walmart cashier, it's not for me. For so many reasons, but mainly because I'm not equipped to deal with stupid people. I've had my ass grabbed, my hand cut open and told that my hair looks like shit and I should do my roots. Four days people. Not for me.I celebrated my 13 year wedding anniversary after the kids both had their birthdays. They are now officially 12 and 8. Go babies go. Last night I got home to a message from a recruiter about the job I interviewed twice for and I got it. Woohoo, I start Jan 10th. I have a lot of...

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Latest Greatest

So I got my associates confered to me this week, woohoo. May can't come fast enough for my next degree. Happy days!Tomorrow I start my new part time job....I'll be your friendly Walmart cashier. Really kinda looking forward to it, hoping to get late late hours and I might actually meet some people here in this place. I also got my sub teaching quals passed by the school board so after I fingerprint next week I'll be ready to sub starting in Jan! Woohoo. Although, all that may be have a different outcome. I have a 2nd interview on Monday for a job I really want. I'm one in 3 out of the initial...

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Happy 12th Bday Kid

Princess celebrated her 12th birthday this past weekend. Since she was technically birthed on Christmas Day.....imagine trying to have a kid during late late Christmas Eve night when all the nurses and doctors were eating turkey and pie then drinking spiked eggnog at a military hospital. I regress, sorry. So we celebrate early around here. We had a crap ton of little girls over for a sleepover which included: flashlight treasure hunts in the dark, karoake till my ears bled, and then spa time. It...

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I B Busy....

I know it drives you nuts not knowing what's going on with me......but I b busy, no worries, lol. I have spent a ton of time in the last two weeks....applying for local jobs, getting local jobs then getting a call that the job is kaput because of a hiring freeze. So I took a class to sub in our local school district, since I'm at the schools all the freaking time. I almost have all my qualifications up to date, transcript should be here tomorrow and then I'll be ready to do my FBI fingerprinting...

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Oh Lord

I have 9 11-12 year old little girls. It's Princess' birthday party and they are sleeping over. So far so good. I still have to dig out some clues and set up the glow in the dark treasure hunt, so we'll see how that goes but so far we b surviving. Dave is even knee deep in the middle....true sigh on a man, he hasn't run for the hil...

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Busy Day, Fork My Ass

I'm sitting down for the first time today and my makeup is making my face itch. Yeah, you read that right, I'm in warpaint. I did observation today and got to teach Algebra II this morning. That was stinking cool! Dude, seriously I didn't realize how much math I've absorbed over my careers and schooling. Crazy! So when I got itchy just watching, I grabbed some paper and started working out the problems they kids were working on too, and then the teacher just handed the class over and I started their lessons on factoring polynominals. I had a great time, the kids were super respectful and well...

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Wow.....no really wow

so while pulling down Christmas stuff from the attic, Princess was up there digging in some old boxes that I seriously move house to house but never even open..........I don't know why. But she found something balled up and dirty.My wedding dress.Seeing how my anniversary is in two weeks, for giggles I hid in the bathroom and tried it on. Just to have princess come in and scream....the farker fits, wait that's not completely true. It's baggy around the hips and waist and will only zip up the back to the bust.....Turns out after having two kids you really do change shapes. That was fun until I...

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Oh Boy

I'm job hunting......sigh.......in the big city. Gave up on this poor little towns around here and am looking to commute into the big ole city. I'm not happy about it but you do what you gotta do. That being said, I'm in such a foul mood right now, I'm seeing everything in a reddish tint. Sigh......... being a grown up suc...

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Scrooge Lives Here

So the kids and I bugged Dave enough that he braved the attic and drug down our tree and box of decorations........box?I had like four boxes of decorations.......Before the big move last year apparently.Luckily I had a little garland, a pre-lit tree, the tree shirt and our stockings. A few homemade ornaments and we're done in like 15 minutes.Seriously it was insane, made even worse when Duchess stood back with her hands on her hips and announced........" Jeez, Scrooge Lives Here".Great.I've got too much else on my plate to worry about decorations though. So, yep Scrooge lives here baby. Ho Ho...

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I'm proud, but I cried a little

So in lieu of the lice infestation going through the schools.....we got a nice letter about it, apparently it truly is rampant in this damn town during winter..... we signed off on the girls getting a big ole haircut. This makes all our lives easier and since their hair grows as fast as mine it'll be back long by summer, we ok-ed. But it stepped up a notch, cause Duchess came to me and told me that she wanted to donate her hair to cancer kids. Seems watching Extreme Makeover Home Edition is bringing...

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I got some sleep.....which = trouble

When I finally get some sleep, I wake up ready to take on the world. In this case, it's taking care of a tummy-flu bug having Princess, digging about 24 new recipes to try, helping a girlfriend sign up for online school, and cleaning my house. Sleep makes a H4G good.....I finally managed to get my library books back and pay my $1.60 fine. Opps. (side note: I'm really an honest person, don't ask me if you don't want to know....and during an interview not to long ago for yet another job I got told I was overqualified for they asked if I'd ever been in trouble.....and I answered yes, I have had quite...

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I'm Running Away

So Princess came home with lice last night...............Kill me now. Found a few lice (GAG) and some nits (ewwwwww) then checked Duchess and here we go again. This damn school system is under a lice seige every winter apparently. Kill me now...... Dave is threatening to shave his and MY heads if we end up with this crap cause of the babies. He thinks I can rock the O'Connor look, or as I like to think, my daddy's cueball look. Seriously, all morning was spent doing treatments and now they are saute-ing with olive oil treatments under some big ole "I am in the robbing of convenience stores line...

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Oprah is the Anti-Christ.....I knew it!

Apparently all it took for Dave to stand up and annouce it was "time for me to get a job" was watching an episode of Oprah and sending him a little congrats letter on beating the national average concerning the average amount of sex in a month............. ummmm what'd I say wrong? lol.He really did announce that I could go back to work though, lol. He was like you are not some Oprah watching housewife, do it, pull the trigger. lolWho knew that that's all it'd take.........?Except 10 minutes later he was asking me to run him a million errands this next week, so I'm wondering how he'll take the...

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I'm Exhausted

I am truly beat. The last two days have been a trail. Dave and I enjoyed our vacation time so much but man it left little time for school so the last two days have been a rush to get our work done, done well and turned in. I made it by two minutes last night. Then was so stressed out, wound up I couldn't sleep. I really think that if insomnacs ever joined together and took seige to the world in the wee hours of the morning, we could rule this b*tch. But I finally passed out just to have the alarm go off 3 hours later to get kiddos off to the bus. I gotta figure out how to reverse my sleep schedule....

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What I do when I can't sleep

Since there are times when I'm zoned out and can't sleep, I look up silly stuff. Tonight's feast of giggles from googling "bad parking notes"......I needed new inspiration cause i keep paper and pens in my console just for this exact reason!!!!! Some of my new ideas, wonder if it's bad taste to pre-write some up just to have hand...

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Honey, I'm Home

I just walked in the door and logged on to do my homework, and now find myself procrastinating ;). What a wonderful Thanksgiving with the family, only could have been better with my momma there, cause my daddy drove in for a visit from his hunting camp!!!!We cooked, we ate, we played dominoes, we yelled, we argued, we laughed, we herded kids, we kissed boo-boo's and we all caught up. It was fantastic. However, I didn't find a reason to fork anyone in the head so my mom will be disappointed. Since we got in late, Murphy is still at the boarders until tomorrow. Sniff my house is empty without my...

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Louisy-nanna

we are just loving this family visit. My nanny and Big Daddy have done quite a few renovations on their new place and we are loving the guest room, just all Southern elegance. The kids are gone off with my aunts shopping and hanging out and Dave is holding the fort with the "menfolk" in front of the tv. Nanny and I are happily cooking ourselves into an afternoon nap. I got sweet potato casserole in the oven, sharing some space with carrot cake. I got two pecan pics ready to put in the oven and it's all gluten free. Loving this!!!!!Best note of today: my pearl wearing proper nanny uttered the word...

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I bring the drama where ever I go

So we made it safety yesterday. Well we made it safely to the nearest big city about an hour from my hometown yesterday when the worst contamination I've ever had struck. It started with the normal cramping and then proceeded to sharp pains then drove me to my knees in a fastfood parking lot. Then Dave drove me to the nearest ER where I briefly remember laying in a fetal position crying for some time until the doc on duty got in my face and said there was nothing vital on that side of my stomach so I had to wait for a bed in the ER. The kids were scared, I was scared and felt like someone...

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Prepping for Roadtrip

Lousie-nanna here I come. We leave tonight to head back to my old stomping grounds to stay with my pearl-wearing-nanny for the Thanksgiving holiday. I'm so looking forward to cooking with my aunts and hanging with my cousins. Good times they are acoming......and if you know anything about myside of the family, you know there will be a ton of good pics, snort! Cause we b crazy.So today is shaping up to be much better than yesterday. All day yesterday I had a sharp pain in my tummy, damn contamination. By evening, I was walking hunched over holding it, like I was 112. Luckily I woke up and so far,...

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Tendering My Resignation

I'm so ready for this weekend trip to see my family. I need a re-charge. Things around here were as hectic as usual.I spent three hours out and about in traffic looking for the gluten-free flour mix I adore in preparation for the holidays, found 2 bags, that's it. Damn.I did all my papers and tests for this week and posted next week's first assignments. I wrangled my kids and their friends (wow, they just show up at the door now unannounced, kinda cool).I did NO baking like I should have.I threw down an awesome dinner.I helped SOMEBODY with their math, I didn't want to, but it had to be done.I...

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Overview: the usual Griswald weekend

I know you're just dying to know how the rest of my weekend went......... snicker, right. But here we go. I'm confident that we are now on top of the LICE (gag) issue. This is only the portion of goodies left on my counter. Ummm the masks are for the sick person (me) who can't smell anything BUT this crap apparently. So far, thankfully the rest of the house is in the clear.Our Christmas boxes were delievered. We had such a wonderful time with this project. We are going to do it yearly! We jollied...

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Fork Me- I'm Done

I'm sitting here listening to the gentle swish of the dishwasher and ............ nothing else. Finally. Everyone is in bed, even the Murphy. Busy day and finally a little mommy time. Plus I get to sleep late in the morning and I know Dave'll run interferance with them heathens we are raising. Firstly, Duchess is 99% LICE (gag) and nit (ewww) free. Her hair is gloriously shiny too to boot. I did a run through this evening and found NOTHING. But I'll continue with my little regimine for another two days to be sure and then in 7 days rinse/repeat to make sure sure sure that I've cold heartedly murdered...

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ClusterF$@! Day

Thank the sweet plastic baby Jesus on the dashboard that yesterday is finally over. The olive oil treatment was rocking. (ummm not to be used on colored hair please, this is my nicey public announcement for the year) The kids' hair is so stinking soft and glossy. Totally run way worthy. While rinsing her hair I noticed that my 7 year old has beautiful, healthy ASS length hair. Wow, didn't realize it was that long as we are the house of simple ponytails. We b real classy like that, plus I never learned how to fix hair so there you go. Then we did another comb through and she is looking dang good...

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The Battle is On

We have begun. It's like a redneck version of Mad Max over here. Dave was my hero. He came in from work, ate dinner and then after dinner when we found the LICE (gag) he did the store runs and stayed up some to help me do the treatments. If I wasn't so paranoid about getting lice myself, this whole process would be fascinating. Duchess is actually looking at it from a scientific view: she wants to put the dead bugs under the microscope, this is not from my side of the family, come to think of it,...

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I miss homeschool

Duchess brought home a very special "regular" school gift. Head lice.The entire class has it and will be out, all of them missing the big Thanksgiving Day feast. I'm wondering if the teacher did this on purpose? hmmmmmmmm. Anyway, Dave is the stud. Came in from a long day, ate, then went to grab the stuff, check all our heads, then helped me to treat the only one (so far) who has it...........poor poor Duchess.She's a little freaked out.Bless her heart.And I'm so tired I can't see straight.Tomorrow will be even more fun as I strive to sterilize the house, bedding, furniture, do another rise and...

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I have Itis

Went to doc finally:bronchitis - checktonsillitis - checksinusitis - checkand strep - checkWell F%$* ...

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Dog Chains? Really?

So Dave came home from work and walked in about 10 minutes earlier than usual. Traffic must have been light. And as usual, dinner was due out of the oven in 10 minutes. So no hot steaming plate, but hey I was close.So while the meatloaf was getting that special sweet glaze, Dave helped me take the trash out for the trash peeps tomorrow. And was giving a little grief over dinner not being ready, damn I've spoiled that man.So he asks if he's ever told me the story his buddy shared with him about when he met his wives grandmother for the first time. She told him that whenever she didn't have a hot...

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Yuck

I'm pretty sure my hair is standing on end. Murphy is in heaven as there are used snot rags all around my couch where I've napped, hacked up a lung, and watched tv with no sound all day. Tomorrow I'm dragging my toxic ass to the doctor. I'm just yucked out with myself. Although I just looked over at Duchess who is wearing the cutest little winter skirt/legging outfit and is currently posted up on the loveseat like a beer bellyed trucker watching some Monday night football. She is covered in chip crumbs, balancing a bowl of salsa next to a big ole cup of tea. Dude, really? Her response "What mom,...

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Don't Be This Person

When I'm medicated I'm a pain in the a&&. I'm also emotional and cry over everything. For crying out loud, I'm writing a paper this morning watching an episode of Making the Team: Dallas Cheerleaders (tv options are slim my friends, real slim) and I just started boo-hooing when one got cut. I seriously have some issues. Then I cried when I realized that Murphy lost his new chew bone and is doing an ADD run around the house in circles trying to find it. Then I cried cause I realized that I'd forgotten to take my meds on time so I feel even worse than I thought possible while waiting on...

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8 baths

When I'm sick or feeling crappy, my solution is always the same: I take a hot bath.I've had 8 today and it's only 5 pm. Good grief, do you need any more proof that I have a problem with impulse control?I was suppose to write a paper today. It didn't happen. Blame the meds, but with the plague in full control of self it just wasn't going to happen. So instead I did all the laundry, cleaned the bathrooms, did the grocery shopping, played with Murphy and finished my book. I suck, royally.So now I'll be up tonight as all I have written on this paper is an outline. It's due tomorrow night, but hey...

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The Plague is Back

The dirty nasty plague is back. I feel like Dave backed his truck over me, twice. Now in addition to feeling horrible, I now have medicine head. Which makes me loopy. Poor family of mine.My filter doesn't work in these conditions: In the bathroom at church, I thought the joint was empty as we were late and I had just closed the door when my kid farted really loud, so I did what every mother would do, I yelled "Princess, manners please". Her response: "Was so not me mom". Farter's response: "Excuse me". OMGAWD.In the truck on the way home from church hashing over Princess getting her butt in serious...

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Hello Reality

So we were used to having daddy home for a week then him being gone on the road. He's been home for a week and he's here local for this next assignment. My house is a diaster zone, it's gonna take forever tomorrow to get this place back ship shape. Good grief. I have a really regular schedule that keeps kids busy doing their things, house clean and school done but man, my schedule this week is shot to crap. And to top it off, I'm getting sick. Dry, scratchy throat equals grumpy mom. Otherwise it's so cool to have him here. We kinda like him a l...

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Shopping...and more

So last night we had to venture into hell, I mean the mall. Both of the royal children needed jeans and long sleeve shirts now that cooler weather is finally hitting the Gulf areas. This was interesting. Armed with my list, coupons, and knowledge of which stores were having sales, we went forth into the belly of the beast.JC Penney's: Princess picked up two cardigans (she got her momma's sweater fever) on clearance. Duchess tried on 20 pairs of jeans looking for the ones that hit the tummy, fit the thighs and weren't too long. Poor baby, she was frustrated. Dave throwing options overhand over...

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Happy Veteran's Day

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Dave-isms....

Reasons why I don't know whether to laugh or throw something at him:1. Me: did you do your discussions:Him: no, I would have been the first to postMe: but it's good to set the barHim: negative ghostrider the pattern is fullI have promised myself that I'm going to document some of his blurbs, cause he makes me gigg...

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I Scare Myself

What a productive day for somebody running on 4 hours of sleep! We were up till past midnight, me helping Dave with his math class and he cursing his math class. Dang math class. This morning saw us in the "get the kids' butts on the bus on time" run being that we forgot to lay out clothes, pack lunches, and gather books last night as usual. Fun!Dave got a local assignment so he'll be home for the holidays! Yeah! So he was off to the refinery for a couple of hours this morning.I got off my butt and cleaned the house. Indulged and watched me some Glee.....snicker: Beast!I hit Walmart early: grabbed...

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Hump Day

So man oh man, what amazing week already. Could someone get the plates on that truck that ran my ass over? I'm beat.Back later today with updates, PTA is calli...

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Foot in Mouth

Oh boy, I did it this morning. Lucky for me he thinks I'm cute.This morning, I had a few errands to run and he wanted to come along. Poor guy. So off we go to the primary school for some PTA errands to get ready for VET's day Thursday. We went in and met with Duchess' class. Dave gave a short talk on Vets and the history of a salute. Then we put each little one in front of a red background and took their picture in one of the four military hats I had, one representing each of the branches of service. So stinking cute. We're going to use them to decorate the door for the Vet parade that will be...

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Sunday Recap...Good Lord

Wonderful service at church this morning, really amped me up for the week. Needed that lesson, to wear my love for Christ on my sleeve! Duchess cracked me up today. She wore a turtleneck dress and then proceeded to come running up to me once we got home with it stuck all up around her neck saying "the shell is strangling the turtle, help!!!!". Then there's the rubber snake that my mom gave her that she keeps leaving around the house to scare the living crap out of me, this time it was in the glass bowl where I keep my keys and sunglasses, the little snot. Princess has been a huge help this week,...

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House Full

I have a headache.I'm grumpy.My kids are having playdates.I'm making cupcakes and bugers for 6 little girls.I've lost my mind.But I'm having fun..........

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Be Careful What I Wish For

I really gotta be careful with my prayers. Although I really wish I had the sense of humor to go with my blessings. I got up this morning and lost my mind. Winter has officially come to South East Texas. Good grief, I got up to colder than a witches you know what outside, but after taking Murphy out for a quick tinkle and literally drug him back inside cause I was freezing. That's when I realized it was colder in the house than outside. Shit! This is a problem. I'm already always cold anyway, dang anemia. The heater was on and running but it was below 60 in my house.I could see my freaking breath....

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Stress = Blah

I just love me a big ole steaming bowl of stress.I'll not be asking for seconds....I'm eatting stomach pills like crazy.AND, to make matters worse I've gotten hit up to head the vet day door decorating contest. My mood just went from unhappy to royally moody as sh...

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This Song Really Explains Alot

Never ever wearing a skirt when I go dancing with Da...

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I hate Houston

Driving through Houston freeways is a nightmare. People can't drive in that city, period. Then there are the construction trucks that splash water up on your car in the rainy predawn morning driving by at 100 mph. Except it apparently wasn't water, it was NEON GREEN paint. It goes all down and over my car. Didn't realize it till I was 150 miles away.Bastards.So I'm the one out in the rain this morning, gently working my car over with a cotton ball and some paint thinner getting the green paint removed....

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What Every Girl Needs:

Everyone should shack up in a hotel room with their man..... but since I'm a little different, I had luggage, I mean kids and luggage ;). Dave finished his assignment in Northern Oklahoma and was on his way home when he got a call. He needed to reroute and head to North Dakota (poor baby is gonna get freaking cold). So after we headed off to treat and play games at the church with some of Princess's friends/parents we all met up at my house to regroup for a trip to the local Haunted Barn....

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My Halloween Costume...

Well I can't decide:Choice 1: a box of cheerios and a butcher knife = cereal killerorChoice 2: the Utah mom: drugged out hollow eyes, perfect outfit, hair, makeup and minivan.....Crap, too much work, I have  no idea where to get a minivan at this late ho...

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Hmmmmm

So during one of our soul searching calls tonight, my BFF and I were discussing our fear of heights. And she threw out a comment someone told her about people with a fear of heights:it's not a fear of falling....it's a fear of jumpingHoly crap. Really think about that for a second. Does that mean cause I'm scared of heights, that I'm literally standing on the mental edge? Worrying about jumping off........Geeeeeeezzzzzzzz. Now I can't get that out of my head. Eeeeek.In other news, we got a big blessing today. When we thought Dave's assignment that was ending today would be his last until the new...

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Since I'm On the Subject

Momma,I'm also.... ALMOST sorry that in high school I tackled you in the Jitney Jungle backing you into a display of canned veggies. But I really did want to go to that dance.However, in your shoes I would say no, too.Still, how many good baptist southern girls can say that they had a cat fight in the local grocery store with their momma?None, cause we b one of a kind...

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Wow, lesson learned

 So in July of last year my kid went into surgery, removing her tonsils. It wasn't an unforeseen thing and it was done pretty quickly so we just did what we had to do. Yet another reason why God left me in Utah, my momma was onsite.... really gotta make a plan to get me and my parents in the same area again... but when my mom sent me some pics I dug these out. And damn near cried, more on that later.My baby did great. She came out healthy and everything went smooth. She even felt well enough...

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Long Week

I've had a really long week. It's kick my butt week apparently and everyone was notified except me. Rudeness I tell you, just plain rude.I'll be back in a few days when I don't feel like running someone over with my c...

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Dangerous Combinations

School board and me.Transportation directors and me.Scissors and me.Sigh........ what a long day already. I'm bored to tears and every weekday is starting to bleed together.S...

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I'm A Mess, really

So this blog has for so long been an outlet for me, today it's a very necessary outlet. I was so scared and my tummy is still a mess. But it ends okay, so don't worry.Today was early release cause teachers need to get report cards together. My kids were getting off the bus two hours early. We were going to a movie then on to cheer.They were 3 minutes late, no bus in sight when my phone rang. It was Princess. She said my name and then nothing, but I could hear men in the background. And sirens. Then a paramedic identified himself and told me:My kids were in a bus accident and one's neck was hurting....

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Oh I Suck

So I'm currently learning a very basic beginner piano song:What do you do with a drunken sailorThat is the song name, not revisiting some of our military years, lol. But seriously everytime I look at the title of this song, really obscene things go through my mind.I suck!Back to drunken sailors I ...

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Princess: Rare sighting!

This makes my heart sore.....

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