Southern girl plowing her way through life making the rules up as she goes. Warning: likes to bake, curse, quote movies/literature, is tattooed, married to The Man and mother of two girls. We bring new meaning to the "griswald way of life". Come along for the ride!

Life is My Highway

Montana and North Dakota have become home.... dang it lol.

These Girls

Lord help me but these babies wear me out.... they are just perfect!


Yes, it's from last winter but I adore this us....


This kid glows from the inside out... my almost 11 year old!

We are so smexy!

Favorite sport: embarrassing our kids in public


My mini-me is finding her own way in life

Wednesday, September 28, 2011


That sound you heard about an hour ago was the sound of utter silence. And if you know me, then you probably think if I was in that silence I must have knocked myself unconcious. But alas, no. That was me sitting across from my new doctor, stunned. I'm GF for a reason. I have celiac spru disease which has no cure (yet but I'm sure they'll be using gene splitting soon right?) and I live Gluten Free out of necessity. I struggled for years trying to figure out what was constantly wrong with me, why my normal was so unlike everyone else's. After a long awkward journey, an intern sitting in on a regular doctor appointment accidently diagnosed me. It was crazy. It was completely insane but completely right. So myit  family rallied around me and we jumped in with both feet. Cause it's how we roll, one for all and all that crazy mess. We turned my house into a GF zone after a couple bad attempts of removing gluten from my diet. I even use gluten free shampoo/conditioner now, so it's a pretty life changing thing. I had to change the way I ate and it was the most difficult thing I'd had to do at that point. But over the last three and half years, I've mastered the art of being GF and my normal is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay different now.

That said, since I left Utah I've only been to one new doc. She was not a good match for me. See after I had my girlie parts removal surgery (different subject) in late 09, my system went nuts. I had low everything. Pulse? Blood sugar? Blood pressure? all low. Sleep? Non-existant for months upon months. And when we first moved to Texas, she argued that even though I'd been through umpteen docs and tests and years of drama to get a diagnosis she wouldn't treat me without me seeing her specialist and starting the process over. I don't think so.

So I was gun-shy. Except, I've been having trouble with my tummy lately so I was a good girl and started asking total strangers for referrals. Someone picking up Gluten Free Bisquick at Walmart? Who's your doctor? Buying Gluten Free sandwiches at Jason's? Who's your doctor? Finally found one in my little town here, shocker. A local doc has ALOT of celiac patients and it took eight weeks to get an appointment with him.

I LOVE HIM. We sat down and went through all my medical history and wrapped it up with a candid talk about my routine and mainteance on tummy issues. He's about the most intuitive person I've ever met. He asked questions noone ever asked and I realized that he is very familiar with my lifestyle and how I live with my stomach stuff. It was an extremely joyful moment!

We worked through all my supplements, sleeping habits. He read me the riot act over my smoking then winked at me and said, there I can keep my license now. Then he encouraged me to drop a few things out of my schedule so that I can regulate the amount of stress in my life. (Sorry doc but I"m not putting off my MBA, no way). Then it was sleeping, he told me to chart my sleeping habits cause I was honest and told him that without any aids, I'd trained myself to get at least four-five hours of sleep a night. So I'm a work in progress.

But the silence, those deafening crickets.............. when we finished up and got ready to leave he simply shook his head at my file and told me "You've dodged alot of bullets healthwise young lady, yet here you are happy and healthy. You did that, not a doctor. But I'll try to help you the best I can"

I cried a little in my car over that one. I can't remember the last time someone looked at me and saw the sum of every hurdle behind the smiles and smart ass mouth. It put a little extra something in my step, because I didn't do that........God did that. He's got my back. Since I was a toddler was wasn't ever suppose to walk unassisted to this very moment, he's had my back!

Now I'm gonna go take my kids to church, cause he's got their backs too!

Sunday, September 25, 2011

To Do: Or Else!

  • get homework done today for entire week
  • brick up path by door
  • get rid of nasty ugly slimy bug thing stuck in back door
  • finish cleaning bathrooms
  • finish cleaning laundry
  • get floors done
  • help Prin get ahead of science vocab
  • read with Duchess
Now to get off my arse

Saturday, September 24, 2011

I earned this........

I'm totally gonna add a little something, something to my Sonic cup tonight. Good grief what a day. It started out great, and while completely nuts it's ending on a high note but really? DAYUM.

I actually got to sleep in. Although I went to bed late cause I was reading the Survivors Club per Dave. See he's determined that I have to read this book, to be prepared for whatever. And since I'm flying out to see him next month, it came into discussion that I'd not gotten past the proulouge. Mainly because in the prolouge it was all about surviving water safety training at a military facility by the author. Ummm, I hate deep water. I don't swim where I can't see the bottom cause JAWS is in there waiting just for me. He likes B+ blood I'm sure of this fact. So why tempt him, you know. I don't even like to swim underwater in a pool where I can see the bottom, forget putting my face in the water to swim too. I've mastered swimming fast without having to do this either. Hell, I barely wash my hair in the tub either. So yeah imagine reading that part of the book about a simulated helicopter crash UNDER WATER and having to get to the surface.

SCREW THAT. But I'm off topic here. I woke up 10 till 9 this morning before the alarm went off thanks to Dave. I had one of those nightmares where you wake up frantic, sweat soaked, gasping for air and scared shitless. I did verify that I hadn't wet myself, yah me! Because that sweet adorable stud I married booked my flights to come see him. And when I noticed the seating he chose it went something like this:

-Dude did you PICK those seats? BTW thanks for the direct flights.
-By the potty? really?
>No, five rows from the emergency exit in the rear of the plane
>Safest place on plane in event of a crash. Also wear sensible shoes, they are a must to quickly escape in event of cabin fire. Didn't you read the Survivor's Club yet?
> Very

So I felt obligated to read that part of the damn book. And it was pretty eyeopening. Everything it says NOT to do during airplane travel.... I do. The few times I fly. I wear cute, nonsenible shoes and then shuck them off immediately. I leave the seatbelt loose cause I hate tight shit on my tummy. I put in my ipod immediately so I don't have to talk to people. I ignore all safety briefings cause really who wants to listen to that crap. I sleep until someone pokes me to get the hell out of their way cause dumbshit, we've landed.

Apparently, I'm a 0% chance of survival in an airplane crash. And I fly very very soon. So I would not be one of the 95% of people that overall survive an actual crash or fire. Great. I'm gonna buy a lotto ticket right before I fly now too. But seriously, I stayed up late last night reading that damn book. Then had a dream about said damn book.

So my day was frantic from the start. With reason apparently, but you can bet your ass that I'll be wearing the right shoes, sitting in the right seat, studying that safety shit like I'm preping for a final when I fly soon.

We got up and quickly hit the local heaven in a hole in the wall donut shop where you can get kolaches and if you don't know what they are, I'll pray for you. The kids stuffed their faces then it was time for momma's Sonic run. We were off. Grabbing girls along the way as it was my turn to carpool, we headed to our new fav ballpark for a sat morning practice. Three hours of dirt, sweat and gossip with the moms. Love it.

I brought them home, fed them through a window and we all hit the hay for a big ole nap. Except my nap went for three hours and it was wonderful. I could write some really hawt lyrics to a good nap!

But the fun really began when I drug myself out of bed. Started by cleaning out my vehicles. I have two with me. Dave has his personal and his work truck in Idaho with him. Now I love having two of my own. When one is down or needs oil changed or what have you, I don't have to count on anyone to help me out. I'm very self-sufficient like that yo. But the jeep has been giving me grief and I have travel tournement coming. I hate packing equipment/kids/supplies in my car for a road trip so I cracked the hood, borrowed some jumper cables and had at it. No dice. Using my car, I jumped the jeep but it wouldn't keep a charge. So I struggled alot and finally got the battery out and into my car. This is where I called Dave and bragged about getting that huge monster out by myself just to have him tell me that is a really light battery. Stop raining on my parade babe!

I have Kay with me this weekend as B is working and it really feels natural to have this kid with me. It's like I have three kids instead of two. Love it. So we hit up her house for more clothes for the weekend and I need to grab a new battery for the jeep. Now my goal is to get to walmart and get what I need and get out. Right............

Wrong. I get there and my battery is under warranty. So they have to put in a super duper charger to test it for sure. It takes an hour. Well I'm a multi-tasker. So since there is no wait, I have them take my car to change the oil. And me and all the kids head into walmart where I start shopping for groceries and stuff and they start off watching fish (hear this, I will not have fish in my house again. After crying my butt off over wiki, I just can't do it again) but they could stand there and watch them for hours. So off I go. Except before I even got to the grocery section, I'd been paged three times. Turns out my break light was out. Yes, fix it. Then I got three aisles and called again. The CAR BATTERY was bad and going dead too. Could someone please look up the odds of this shit? Please........ So yes, replace it and thank you Lord it's under warranty too. So I finally get to grocery shop and doing it with an 8 year old and two tweens is rough stuff. I sound like a drill instructor........Fall in, fall in, fall in. Yes, we do formation when we pass other people cause I hate those people who let their kids block aisles and stuff. Not cool people, take control are don't bred please.

Two hours later..........yeah you read that right. TWO HOURS LATER. I had a $12 core charge only for one battery and 50% prorate on the other and a shiney car with fresh oil and a trunk full of groceries and one new waffle maker. We love waffles dude.

I got home just in time to rush inside and dive over the loveseat to catch LSU make their second score. I was a bad mom and made the kids bring in groceries so I could at least listen to my boys play. Then I whipped up some waffles!

So all in all, this day has rode me hard and put me up wet but LSU is winning, I have new batteries and a purty car. Full belly and my house is semi clean.

Life is blessed.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

My tongue is tired

Tomorrow my goal is to talk to noone at work. Cause I have spent most of today on the phone at various times with too many people at work. Then came home and talked to four of the most important people in my life (except Mae dang it, gotta call you tomorrow girl) for most of the evening. I've gotten crap done on my school but I do tend to clean house or do laundry while I chat so everything is sparkley clean! Yah! Things are moving at warp speed as usual and tomorrow is due a big ole update. Till then, I'm gonna go rest my poor talked out tongue. Nite ya'll.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Old As Shit... Is Me

 So my kid is in 7th grade. So my kid is almost 13. She has a Christmas birthday so California says start a year behind... I say GOD BLESS THEM. Cause I got to put this off for a year. So this weekend was my kids' first boy/girl school dance. Dave and me be old as shit.

Dave managed to sweep back into town from Idaho, just in time too. So we were able to be there for the primping, the dress up and the drop off. Then we grilled her and sweet B, my bff, who managed to sneak into said dance with her camera and keep a close eye on our kids.

 Drop off. We were told to "look nice" cause hello, everyone will be there! And were they ever. Lined up outside the school, clusters of boys, gaggles of girls, all clutching their $5 cover charge and ready to go through the police and school officials on hand to do the "dress check". This town is serious about their kids yo.

 So for the first time, Prin left my house in mascara and lipstick. Cause that is what Dad and I decided was appropriate for almost 13 year olds in our house. I curled her hair and lent her my jewelry and my bad ass softball player looked like quite the little girl when she left my house with B's daughter. Good Lord, it freaked me out seeing those girls all dolled up. I'm used to seeing them sweaty, covered in dirt and stained uniforms.

 But here's Prin before hand. Notice the camo shirt, lol. There's my kid....

 Me and my baby! Dave and I went to dinner during dance and deconstructed this picture on my phone. She has my cheeks, my forehead, my eyes and the rest is totally him.

The angels in action! Lord help us all!

For the record, I'm so freaking proud of my girl for behaving like a lady and having a good clean fun time. Mostly though I'm proud of Dave for not freaking the duck out and losing his mind over the whole ordeal. Daddy was present, front and center, walked her to the door making sure everyone saw her with her daddy and then let me gently steer him back to his truck. Bless his heart, as tough as it was for me.... it had to be killing him.

He took one look at the "finished" Prin before we left the house and reminded her that he not only bought her first diapers but wiped her butt the first time and had the pictures to prove it. LOL. Poor prin.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Apparently I AM a girl, who knew

There are times that I don't really feel feminine. I think alot of it has to do with the amount of "guy" things I do for fun or do out of necessity but other than mascara, my face hasn't even seen real makeup in a long long time. (Not counting when B does my eye makeup, then I kinda feel like everyone is staring and pointing at the hooker lady with the hooker eyes, which everyone assures me looks great, hmmmm).

But yesterday at work, I was reminded that yep, I'm still very much a girl. I work in a technical field and in an office full of men. I work in a building with maybe 7 women out of almost 200 people that come through daily. In my department, I'm the ONLY female. This works out great for 99.999999999% of the time. I get the nicest bathroom all to myself and my office is the only one that smells nice. Nobody flinches when I drop an f-bomb and they tack Ms. to the front of my name cause it's a southern respect kind of thing (plus I guess I look old as hell).

However, being in a technical field, alot of equipment comes through our warehouses and since they moved a portion of the warehouse into a space that shares the main wall with our offices, we now have bugs. As in cockroaches. Those farkers are breeding like we're handing out gov cheese up in that place. AND I DON"T DO BUGS! Yeah, I am not a fan of anything buggy boo like at all. I can handle the office mouse that hangs around occassionally but hello, no bugs.

In my office I have cabinets for IT equipment and etc. There is alot of them and one in particular is my fav. An older tall filing cabinet with about 14 drawers that is perfect for chargers, cords and etc. It's the phone cabinet. And when I needed to test a handset, I just reached over and from memory pulled open the drawer and reached in.

Came out with a huge cockroach.

Oh Hell to the NO.

I screamed like somebody was trying to snatch the winning lottery ticket from my hand. There are apparently no good descriptions for the pitch of that scream either. The corporate safety guy who was camped out down across the hall in my conference room with his NOISE REDUCTION HEADPHONES ON, heard me. The HR guy from Dallas in the office next door was scared through a wall and dropped his phone. Both came running. And stared as I held this big ass MF-ing half alive, half dead THING in my hand.... still screaming.

Now the guys that I work with on a daily basis? Never moved. One kept typing away on his keyboard, another was walking by and without looking goes "blood?" and then kept going, and the last one was on his phone and goes "first aid kit? No? ok, anyway...." and continued his conversation. I'd say they know me pretty well.  My boss merely banged on the adjorning wall of our offices and told me to turn down my crappy music. Nice!

So once the safety guy from Dallas grabbed said roach and calmly walked out the office with it, things went back to normal.

Except, now everytime I open a drawer or cabinet in my office........ I leave it open and LOOK VERY CAREFULLY before putting my hand in. Which wouldn't be so funny except I have caught everyone one of my coworkers doing the same damn thing in their offices too today, lol.

Orkin will be onsite tomorrow or I"m going on strike!

I do not do windows, coffee runs or cockroaches.

I'm a girl damnit.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Contents Under Pressure

I'm a wee bit stressed. Who I am freaking kidding, I'm like a shaken up hot can of coke that is about three seconds from taking your hand off when it explodes! Worse part, I've just turned in my test with what I'd put money on is the best damn argument I've done in my life and nobody but my professor will ever know. Crap. So that is done and the list is still lengthy. I really tend to do my best work under pressure. Although if you know me at all, you know that I'm under pressure 99.9% of the time. There is always a long and lengthy list of things that need my attention be it my babies, their scheduling (I'm STILL behind on dental cleanings damnit) of appointments, tournaments, school functions, lessons, friend get togethers, birthday parties they need to attend, and etc. Or my school, or my work (lord not going there as there is always a long list that I never seem to get to there), or things for Dave or shit sometimes just things for me (like remembering to shave my hairy ass legs before wearing shorts out in public, nice one!). The things that irrate me the most are the stupid stuff, like forgetting to put deo on the grocery list thus necessatating yet another run to Wal-Mart which is a guaranteed $100 right there (if you can walk in and get one thing without remembering 30 others you need, very nicely pull your bottom lip over your head and shut up, cause I can't, lol). I do that constantly. Tonight I reminded myself three times that I need gas and to get a new tire asap. Yep, on the way home I kept saying to the kids over the radio, "what IS that noise" well my car not only blinks a pretty little orange symbol at you but also flashing how many miles till empty and when it's damn near dead from thirst it'll start "dinging" at you. Yep, in the morning I HAVE to stop for gas or I'll be in the morning conference call via the side of the highway. Could someone please call me at 6:50 am and remind my ass to GET GAS.

Yeah, funny thing. I have yet to figure out how to carve stress from my life. I just don't have the bandwidth to do it without something big going without and I refuse to allow that so here we be. So I'm once again forced to try and find stress releases.......... smoking still helps (dont' bother even going there peeps, I already know), zumba landed me back in my knee brace for the last week so no help there, running helps but frankly I have yet to find any time this week and when I can go late at night there's that whole leaving the kids alone while they sleep thing (AINT gonna happen) and I'm truly scared that one of these backwoods Texans coming off the swing shift sleepy will plow my ass over on the side of the road so nope. Baths help but I"m starting to look like a prune, very ashy for a white girl! Yeah, running out of suggestions. Lately I just start thanking God for every tiny little blessing I have until I forget what I was stressing about. Come to think of it, should have tried that first. So if you pass me and my lips are moving, I'm destressing, leave me be.

Monday, September 12, 2011

Ponderings from a Long Meeting

So when you're required to sit in a meeting (okay, be in a meeting via conference call) during which your part was at the beginning and the very end, the middle kinda stretches out into blah...................................................................................................................................

So it was during these moments that me and a few of my counterparts in other cities were in a group IM which usually has a weekly theme. This week's theme was not picked by me, it was "lessons learned". Wow, how about some deep shit on a Monday peeps. Two weeks ago was mine and it was "ways to use the word goat in a curse word", much more creative and entertaining I think. Since it was a group of professional women, it was even funnier than it sounds. snicker. I'm a bad influence.

Except it started out serious but quickly went into "don't fry eggs naked" kind of stuff. But the serious stuff, yeah that kinda sits with you too.

Things like:

-Listen with your heart not your head- hmmm okay, true enough.
-no such thing as too late- actually yeah there is, like as in oh I don't know... too late for a wedding, too late for putting the winning lotto numbers in before the drawing. etc.
-words mean nothing if there is no action behind them- ouch....
-the early bird gets the worm- sometimes, but sometimes that only refers to garage sales and Black Friday loot

Yeah, apparently I'm Debbie Downer, lol. I was once really optimistic, crap guess that went the way of the birds huh?

Does life make you bitter? Do we lose all our optimism? Or is that just called "growing up"?

Hmmmmm, now I've purged all the serious thoughts from my head I'm gonna go eat cookies and watch Sookie try and choose between Bill and Eric.

(Dude, that girl needs to just Viking up!)

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Last two weeks in review.. cause I'm lazy

So as usual around here, it's been slam packed with busy! Dave came in, we had a tournament where Prin slammed her first triple and RBI-ed. Duchess got caught on cam singing (she sings all the time but it's like trying to catch a UFO on film). So yeah, the whole last two weeks condensed like some soup concentrate for your viewing pleasure, via pics. Repeat: I'm lazy and I have school work.

 The sushi eater was in town. Seriously it kills me to sit across from him while he's eating raw fish but I think that is half the appeal for him. I paid extra and my shit was cooked yo! Although he did order me a pina colda and it wasn't even noon technically, I'm such a bad person, but they didn't serve Coke.

 The kid wants to attend her first boy/girl dance, so she is all about helpful! Dayum you 7th grade decision makers, I'm not ready for school dances! So far it's a 2 hour ordeal and she can go per Dave, but no dress, no date and well I'm just looking for a reason to crash this thing.

 It's FOOTBALL season, and I'm all pimped out in my LSU gear. Geaux tigers geaux! It's an epic event in my house, the kids and I represent on game days! Being in this far corner of Texas where I can be in La in literally 20 minutes makes it more Tiger country than Aggie country so if you are a Texas Football Fan, Bite me!

 Duchess working her way through snacks at the fields. The kid brought all her zui zui pets to the game about 2 hours from home, so it was "rat" city but the other kids (not the players but the group of siblings) where in HEAVEN. She's very industrious. I'm really proud that it didn't occur to her to "rent" them out though.

 So we all gathered and hit the local steak house, seatting a softball party of 33 please. Yeah, kids, parents and etc... it was madness. Hysterical madness but fun to hang with the other parents. Yeah you read that right, I was in a forced socializing situation. BA ordered a damn margarita, I shouldn't have stuck with coke, I should have joined her. Oh and the peanut fight ended in a draw.

 There's my baby behind the plate. Blows my mind that the kid wound up being a catcher. I never saw that coming and neither did Billy, her other coach. But there she is, getting more and more aggressive behind the plate. Hell, this game she had the ball and literally chased a runner back to third to avoid a steal home. Go tiger go!

 The coolest part is when she throws that helmet off and jams after a

 There's BA and her drink! Boo and Duchess at the "tiny tot only" table behind her, lol.

 At one point, they ended up playing in 40 mph winds, driving sheets of rain and cold cold temp drops. Thanks to that tropical storm! I wound up taking Duch to the jeep and watched from the safety of the heater vent. Dave represented at the field side.

 Kel pitching, the kid rocks and Prin covering second. These girls are trouble with a capital T together, love it!

 Dave doing the no-no finger thing hanging at B's. He kicked our ass soundly in cards. The punk. Yeah honey, you're a punk.

 But he's the punk that got out in the back yard and used our set up to throw balls at his catcher daughter. Who was stopping balls with her body, no glove. Dayum, that scares me but it's part of the catcher drills.

 Duchess and the neighbor girl finally catching the bus without the "moms" standing watch. So I hid behind the roses and keep an eye out until she boards...........cause I'm a stalker mom.

 This weekend I took Kel, Prin and Duch to the mall then dinner. I really love the time with these kids, they amuse the utter crap out of me. And they got applause after doing a line dance beside the table, lol.

 Ummm after practice they were tormenting the local Wal-Mart. Sorry Mom!

 Dude, Duchess sings! I fooled her into thinking I was facebooking on my phone, lol but I recorded the whole song, it's on the Vid page of this blog, lol.

 I even hung my own flag. After borrowing a drill charger, drill bit and then finally his drill from my neighbor. Took forever but I got it!

 I took the tweens to church too, good lord. At least my kid wore a dressy shirt, lol.

 Duch still wears dresses everyday to Dave's relief. Prin is like me though, you ain't gonna jack her into a dress unless somebody is wedding or burying.

 And the only pic of us from date night. I was running on 7 hours of sleep for 2.5 days at this point and this was around midnight when we stopped at walmart to grocery shop before heading home. Cause we be party animals up in this beeeach.

See I looked nice early before we left! Does anyone else have to take pics of their outfits and send to their friends for "approval" cause I leave the house looking like a hot mess if Case, M, or BA one don't voice some opinion. Somebody come take my "girl" card please.

Friday, September 9, 2011

Date Nite Recap

So Dave was in for a long long weekend for Labour Day. It was great. The kids got lots of daddy time and we had some parents time, nice. I even took 1.5 days off work to guarantee that time too! So he got in just in time to see the kids in from school then off to softball practice we went. Friday we put the kids on the bus and had a whole day together! Then pick my arse up off the floor the guy had arranged for friends to watch the kids overnight and we went on a real date. As in get dressed up, had dinner, hit the country club date. It's been YEARS! I'm not sure what prompted this action but I'll take it!

We played pool, we ran into a coworker and his date, we all played pool, then we danced! He hasn't really twirled me across a dance floor and grinned at me like that in a while, it's hard to connect like that when you are surrounded by careers, kids and life huh? But it was pretty damn good. At 11, we left and giggled our way through grocery shopping at Walmart before finally getting home and crashing. It was great.

We left when they stopped playing country and started playing ICE ICE BABY, and a Richard Gere lookalike with long white hair was burning up the dance floor! OMGawd, my eyes!

True I needed an ice pack the next morning, damn bum knee I forgot to wear my brace! But it was great.

Nice to feel like I'm "dating" my husband sometimes.

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Banner Day - Results

Apparently my kids' school rocks. Not only did Prin turn in those tests but she already has grades. On the science work that was done last minute under the threat of a whip and duct tape: a 97. The English got extended one day and the history test a whooping 78. Her response, "well I passed but I crapped out". She told her teacher she just didn't study much and it was her fault, his response.... "duh". Love it.

Now excuse us, after a full day of work stress, softball practice and homework, we're all going to bed RIGHT NOW.


Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Banner Day

This day can just wank it! Seriously, I'm ready for my book (ohhh new JR Ward book is in my greedy little hands), bath and a glass of wine. Too bad it ain't gonna happen cause of the tween. She is grating my last nerve! But I wuv her..............

So tonight is a typical Wed night. I commute home jamming out to my music in traffic, grab Duch from after-school (I miss my nanny damn it), get home, throw everything down, fix a soda and review homework and paper folders (yeah cause mid week is the perfect day for papers to come home right?). Then normally, we eat quickly and if it's my turn to carpool the kids, I grab my friends kids and drop tweens off at youth and little ones at awanas then hit up errands like groceries, gassing cars, etc.

Except today, roadblocks like I'm driving in Tulsa, the city of perpetual construction! Dayum. Prin got busted taking pics with her buddies and posting them via her friends smartphone on facebook during pe (busted by her mom who is her fb friend, duh) and while that may seem trival, it's just not cool in this house where school is first and foremost about the grades little missy! Then she whips out some science work and very calmly announces that all 8 pages of questions are due tomorrow. Then after trying to fib and whine her way out of it admits that the shit was given to them Friday but she didn't want to do it on her weekend off. Ex-squeeze me? Duck that crap. She also has some english due and a history test.

Fed'em sandwiches, loaded up the car........ then promptly sent Duch back inside for her awanas shirt and book to find that she has lost her brand new never used awanas book. Ummmm no. So we trashed her room, no book. We left emptyhanded. Grabbed friends kids (I can now brag that I can buckle in a carseat in under 34 seconds) and get to church. We were only 7 minutes late, cause I have to do the speed limit when I have precious cargo.

Dropped tweens off at their building in the rear of the property, dropped Duch off at tnt class with a reminder not to talk anyone to death and parked to walk in Boo who is four and my bff. Except Boo wanted me to stay and go to cubbies with her. After finally prying Boo off my leg and running for the hall, I round the corner and promptly fall into the old off duty cop with a huge gun holstered to his leg. Awkward. Untangled self, apologized and complimented his piece (really nice custom grip!) and ran for the parking lot like the hounds of hell were on my heels. Boo is dangerous. A few tears and I'm ready to sign over my life insurance to her, it's scary.

So now we're home and after re-cleaning her room, Duch found her awanas book in a play backpack. Clothes laid out, she run through the H4G economy carwash (aka faster shower on earth) and into bed. But not before she ate half my dinner, damn shouldn't have put that sausage in my omelet.

So I'm left with Prin. Her punishment was simple: I made her post on her facebook account that she is grounded from fb for a week. Public humiliation for one? Yes please. Then I changed the password. Cause I'm smart like that yo! Then to be safe, I took her laptop. Ha! And then changed the password on my laptop, louder ha!

So I"m ready for bed needing some serious sleep yet here I sit. Watching the tween yawn and drool over the science work........ "only 2 more questions mom" yep and then there's the english babe and the history study guide. Ya Mule Ya. See, she won't be going to bed until it's all done. And she'll be getting up usual time in the morning. And after school, she has running practice with her team. So lesson will be learned the hard way, through little sleep and some serious exercise. :) Mom is always right kiddo.

I can't count the times she said tonight "I'm never doing this crap again" under her breath.

Well pumpkin, that is the point, now isn't it?

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Wow, out of the mouth of my tween* kinda

So Prin wrote a diamante poem today for school and I found it in her packet..... it's about me and Dave.

helpful, academic
working, caring, loving
maid, chauffer, skilled
fishing, hunting, shooting
strong, mathematical

So the top part is me? Damn I got all the sweet characteristics. Nice! Guess my kid does see me as something other than Rosie the Robot Maid.

I am totally giving her extra dessert for this one!

Dave didn't do too badly either, it's a well known fact in my house that I don't do math without a huge complicated calculator. ;)

Saturday, September 3, 2011

The past two days might have done me in........

I had shopping day with husband to get on top of the kids' stuff. I had a date night with husband. I had four hours of sleep before it was time to get up and drive to a tourney where we played four tough games over fourteen hours. We are finally home. Tomorrow, news and more news.......and pics and more pics. Tonight.... I'm waiting on my midnight whataburger run (without bun of course) and then I'm going to crash and sleep like the dead until it's time for the late morning service.

I have bags under my eyes bigger than my purse and that shit is saying something cause my purse is ginormous!

Friday, September 2, 2011

I'm a tasteless but happy girl

Thursday, September 1, 2011

So Dave Was At Home When I Pulled In Tonight

Dave's in for the long labor day weekend. And finally listened to me: he didn't waste time with a boring t-shirt from god knows where he was on assignment. This time I got "babe, found a tasteless shirt for you this morning at the airport!"

I can't wait to wear this b*tch! Woot!

So we got a tropical storm brewing (hello hurricane party by B's pool!), a tournement out of town, a bbq with friends, shopping for new bras (long story, to be told later) and more.......

It's gonna be a "labor" weekend for sure!