Southern girl plowing her way through life making the rules up as she goes. Warning: likes to bake, curse, quote movies/literature, is tattooed, married to The Man and mother of two girls. We bring new meaning to the "griswald way of life". Come along for the ride!

Life is My Highway

Montana and North Dakota have become home.... dang it lol.

These Girls

Lord help me but these babies wear me out.... they are just perfect!


Yes, it's from last winter but I adore this us....


This kid glows from the inside out... my almost 11 year old!

We are so smexy!

Favorite sport: embarrassing our kids in public


My mini-me is finding her own way in life

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Not Done Yet....

I'm exhausted, weary and about ready to beat my head on the wall but I'm still here.

What the hell ever possessed me to take accounting 2 along with pyschology?

Week 2 is over. I had two pysch papers, a 19 question set of stocks/bonds homework, a math quiz, six discussion questions and had to proof three student's papers.

Wanta know about the evolution of gender roles? Ask me. I'll email you my paper. I got 100%. Curious about the use of hindsight bias in everyday life? Ditto..... Need to know whether your current stocks were presented to you correctly (cause you can actually have a stated rate of 8% interest growth and then receive anything beneath it, did you know that?) Have a question about the difference between contributed capital and retained earnings? I'm your girl, got a 95% on that b*tch.

So the cost of the above?

Another patch of gray hair, I haven't shaved my legs in WEEKS. My children can know give you a rundown on the various brain functions (they quiz me) and I waited till today to shop for Thanksgiving.

Work is hectic but good.

So we're hosting Thanksgiving dinner (or supper for those of us from the South) for friends and my beloved mommy. We'll have a full house. The house that is currently filthy. I have to scrub bathrooms and then move outward. I did manage to pick up all the butts that scattered across my backyard when the wind caught my buttcan. Cause hello.....white trash.

(Speaking of white trash, the rednecks with the 14 broke down vehicles and dirty little nakid kids and the dog that bit Duchess, MOVED last week. Yep, in the middle of the night. Nothing left but beer cans and dog turds in that front yard. It's a beautiful thing peeps!)

Among other news I haven't made the time to share. My photo-elusive step-dad is at his hunting camp for the season. He's killed 7. His limit is 4. This is why he's my hero. If you own it, they can't force you to follow no stinking laws! Go dad go. I need some Gluten Free deer sausage! Now if only he'd hit up those cemetaries and get me some iron fencing for my yard. Sigh.

Nanny made it safely home. I miss her already. I can't wait for her next visit. Gonna take more time off and spoil her rotten.

We are deep frying our turkey this year. The Man is prepping his contraption that will accomplish this now. In the past 1.5 hours, we've made great strides on Thanksgiving supper for tomorrow.

Since I wasn't smart enough to buy a house with a double oven......we're batch cooking.

Regular not Gluten Free dressing (stuffing to you yanks) is in the oven. This is my only consection to everyone else, I'm a giver that way. The birds are marinating. The eggs are boiled and ready for deviling, cause I can devil like you wouldn't believe (the secret is bacon!) The sweet potatoes are ready and in the fridge. The GF version of CG's beloved carrot cake is in process, having already been vetted by this family earlier this week. Yum! I'm prepping the GF pie crust as well.

My slaves, I mean my kids have passed out on the couch. Good little kitchen soldiers. The Man has even cleaned the garage for the holiday occassion. OMGosh, just have to share this: the reason I think he caved and cleaned it is not because company is coming. It's because I'm incapacitated currently due to a garage accident.

So I wear high heels every workday. No exceptions. Rain? Snow? yep, even then. I'm talented like that. So the other day we rushed home after karate and peeps, I just had to get inside and run out the backdoor and hide for a smoke. It had been that kind of day. So I was herding kids and as usual, dragging my briefcase, purse, lunchbox, my coat, their coats and keys, cause The Man has this horrible habit of locking the door between the house and garage. Geez. So instead of backing in like I normally do, I nosed in and packed up like the mule that I am. Coming running around the trunk of the car, heading for the home stetch I stepped in one of the many stacks of crap along the garage wall. Landing my high heel in a plastic kids' bike helmet. My heel actually stuck in the top of it throwing me off balance and I skidded a few steps before pitching backwards. I threw everything and landed on my butt, pulling a groin muscle in the process.

Me = not happy camper....... hence my garage got cleaned today.

The only thing exciting that happened this week otherwise was Murphy eating my carpet. But that's another story, for next time. More to come.......

Happy happy Thanksgiving peeps. Count your blessings!

And forgive my purge, but I promise to make more time!!!

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Because I have a sense of humor....

So four generations of my family got together, after driving to a great spot I pass everyday, to attempt a family portrait, except.....

it was freaking cold (17 degrees) and Duchess was exhausted...... and I am heartless.

Take 1

Take 2

Take 3 , then we took it inside.......wimps.......

And my girls and I got a cute, blurry pic....The Man is not a photographer

But Nanny and Duchess make a cute pair.
And we tried it again....oh well. I'm gonna edit the crap out of one of them and frame the bastard!
But true to form: nothing comes easy for us girls.

Friday, November 21, 2008


It's date night.

Kids are at my mom's for a pallet/pizza party.

I spent the evening writing a paper on the gender differences of the sexes and whether it was perceived or reality.

I have officially become boring.

I'm sorry.

The Man fell asleep on me. The dog fell asleep on me.

Now I'm wide awake.

Going to do laundry and clean the kitchen.

If you find my life, pass it over.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

They Hear EVERYTHING...and more

My little easedroppers are everywhere. Yet while they may hear everything, they may not understand.......

Interesting comments from my girls, interrupting parental conversations!

- Who is economy?

-Why are people scared of economy?

-What is an AK-47?

-Why would you step on an elephant?

-Why is daddy got Uncle J's back? He has his own.

-When are we moving to Canada? (in response to the election, hee hee)

-Are you gossiping? It's a sin.

-I told my teacher that you do drugs but that I love you anyway (smoking)

-Did you really gut Bambi?

-How come "that one" is bad form?

-Will the shelter in our basement have a tv?

Not to mention that there is no such thing as privacy in my home anymore. Princess just has to tell me something the very minute she remembers. Interrupting my shower, my bath, or worse....

Somebody lied. Murphy is now 15 lbs and quite the bed hog. Luckily he likes to snuggle to his momma, therefore hogging The Man's side. He also likes to sleep with his head on a pillow. Smart little booger.

My mother is my hero. The one person in the world who doesn't judge me and makes it completely okay for me to not be perfect. I cannot begin to explain how utterly safe this makes me feel.

I adore my girlfriends who call me during the day just to say "hey, thinking of you". Those little calls just make my day.

Last week I got Murphy a new squeeky ball. He has devoured it. It's kaput. He really is a little stinker. But oh so handsome in his LSU kerchief. The Man takes it off, I put it on, he takes it off.

Otherwise, I have to clean my house cause the first full week of school, I have done NO housework. The people are revolting.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Next up......

Accounting 2 and Psychology

What I have learned so far:

1. Business accounting is alot of freaking numbers. But I can now configure your loan accounts. And determine annuities.

2. Psych studies the mental and physical behaviors. And that alot of people are just screwed up from top to bottom. Now, I have to learn WHY?

3. To keep my head straight while taking 2 very indept very short classes, I had to geek up. I have a binder, with weekly calendars marked with exact due dates and important class reminders. Red for accounting, green for psych. It's looking alot like Christmas.

4. It's easier to read my psych book in the bathtub. I credit the soothing sound of running water. Plus the fact that my house is NEVER quiet. Which is why The Man is hiding in the basement with his laptop writing a paper on the exploration of the sea floor. Cause Barbie of Swan Lake is playing in my bedroom, music is blaring from one bedroom and National Treasure is playing in the great room.

5. I have a naughty leftover from college/high school habit of only being able to study to music. So I'm headphoning it when not in the tub. The Man is throughly confused at how I can study the differences in the subcategories of psych while singing along to Lowlife at the top of my lungs. (I can't help it, I automatically sing along)

6. When searching for his bootcamp yearbook to show our company last night a picture of someone they both knew, The Man pulled out my high school junior year yearbook. OMGawd...
I promise to post this picture later cause even I had to's amazing difference what fifteen or so years will do to a person.

7. I love school. I'm the biggest geek I know.

Thursday, November 13, 2008


Accounting 1001 is DONE baby. Over, caput......6 weeks of hell.

And a story.

Three weeks ago, my instructor apparently had a baby. And stopped working at all. Which is completely expected. Except she didn't expect it. First baby. Explains alot.

So after no teacher interaction for three hello, and nobody at the school noticed. Finally after realizing that I'd had no grades for three weeks, that the students were running the show, answering and correcting each other in our discussions and homework assignments... I ratted. I'm a rat.

I emailed my advisor. Less than an hour later, we were assigned a substitute, on the last day of class. Then we found out she'd had a baby.

Is it wrong of me to be ticked?

Cause I pay alot to have a really good private school education via online classes. One where my diploma won't be a joke. I work hard for my grades and my classes are very condensed. So each week it's a challenge to stay ahead of the game.

So there it is, yet another fault that rises to the top......

I'm a rat.

But The Man says my tail is rocking, so I'm strangely okay with it.

*grades are obviously not done so I'm chewing my nails to see if I keep my A.......*

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Belted Up and Ready to Rock

Today was Princess' second tournament. It was more like a practice tourney with three local dojos. But being as she was a fresh yellow belt, she was nervous. She had to perform her Form 2, which she learned the last move on, last week.

With Nanny in town, plus my mom and us all in the front was no wonder that she kept her eyes closed for most of her Form. We are an unruly bunch.
But my baby was once again, one of the lowest belts there. We are now exactly five months into karate. Woohoo. She really enjoys it and has dropped ballet to commit to it. This surprised the ever loving pooh out of me. Cause ballet was all the big deal for years over here.
But today was also a very BIG day. Since getting her sparring gear a month ago, and practicing once a week with other students, Princess was getting into the ring and sparring other kids. For points. She was really nervous. I love this pic of The Man gearing her up. But we aim to keep them safe, while teaching them to beat the utter crap out of others. Irony!

Turns out, headgear wasn't needed so she moved on. Her first opponent, a trash talking blonde. Wait, that could actually describe alot of people I've known, lol. Sorry, focus! Anywho, once the fights were called out, the kids sat in front of us on the floor watching the others until their turn. Blondie came over and sat next to Princess. And started talking about kicking her butt....this went on for some time. Until I started looking around for her parents. As Princess was getting more and more upset. Her little head drooped, her eyes focused on the floor. Turns out, they were sitting right beside me. I know this because Blondie came running over to brag to her mom, who we'll call big blondie. Big Blondie smiled and nodded and sent her on her way. So I did what any other self respecting parent would do......
I called Princess over to me.
And loudly told her, while looking her square in the eye.
"It's not about winning. I swear, it nots. It's about being a good sport. Showing good sportsmanship. Because you know what, you can learn to win but you can't learn to be a decent person. It's heredity."
Then I told her to kick butt and do it the right way.
Big Blondie and husband, never said a word. Just sat there NOT looking at me.

So then it was on. They got into the ring.
And Princess, the same child who is so tenative and meek in sparring class with her fellow students, let her get a few good ones in, but Blondie made a mistake. She pushed her.
The referee reminded Blondie of the whole "play fair, technique not bullying" thing.
But it truly opened Princess' eyes. I was totally prepared for my kid to get her butt kicked. Was ready for it, because honestly as much as she loves karate, she isn't precise. She isn't aggressive. She isn't competitive.
Until today.
This wound up being a forward stomp kick that pushed Blondie back a good foot. It also wound up being the start of Princess' self-esteem. I have never cheered louder.
Blondie beat her by ONE point.
And when it was over, I stood up and let loose yelling for her. And then it happened......
Big Blondie and husband stood up and congratulated BOTH girls on a great match. And when Princess came over to cool down, they kept making comments about her being a tough competitor and what a close match.
Princess just soaked it up and said thank you......

And then kicked this boy's butt.

Although head contact was out, she opps and missed his nose by a mere inch on this kick. I just knew she was gonna land this one and get kicked out.

And although this kid was a puncher, his only moves were with his hands. And he packed a punch, cause she'd go backwards each time......
She kept those roundhouse kicks and front kicks coming.

It was awesome. She got agressive and chased him all over the ring. Kicking away. He beat her by ONE point. This kid went on to place 2nd out of 12 kids in her division.
Where did this tiger come from?

And when it was all said and done....... She got a good pep talk from her coach.
And came running over to me and after letting me gush all over her.....
"Mom, we totally have to repaint my nails, they're all jacked up."

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Daddy Daughter Donut Day

The Man has Daddy Daughter Donut Day at the girls' school tonight. He was told to bring a blanket, his kids and a book. For some good ole fashioned daddy/daughter time.

He let the kids pick the book. Then when they started pulling hair over whether to take "Little House on the Prairie" or "Dora the Explorer" he just couldn't take it any longer.

He left the house with a big ole pink flowered blanket, two girls and this.......

Can't wait to see how this goes over......

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

The South Comes.....

Here ye, Here ye:

My Nanny from Louisinanna.......has come avisiting......

The southern lady who is responsible for all the crazy, wild southern gentile woman that is my mother who is then responsible for all that is me.

Four generations of us sat at my table eating loaded baked potatoes for dinner.

I love family and it's a blessing to have everyone around.

Oh and The Man smashed my beloved Jade tonight.......fender bender is all, no worries. Poor guy, he's not a happy camper. Damn that mini-van driver who slammed on his brakes. He's on the phone with the insurance company, poor baby.

(I'm soooooooooo glad that it wasn't me who did it......)

Monday, November 3, 2008

Halloween: Work Style

Me, the sailor with the cricket......hi boss!
Me with my girls......
We finished up this Halloween in style.
Trick or treating in the misty rain....
Following up with the croup!

Sunday, November 2, 2008

A++ Bookreport

Creative 4th grade teacher required this month's book report to be "visual"......
So creative 4th grader, Princess created a Wilbur pumpkin, took a fern plant and a plastic spider.
And blew me away with her creative self.....

Quite impressive....especially since it was her idea to hammer nails into his snout to make it stay in, she's quite the viscous little thing.