Southern girl plowing her way through life making the rules up as she goes. Warning: likes to bake, curse, quote movies/literature, is tattooed, married to The Man and mother of two girls. We bring new meaning to the "griswald way of life". Come along for the ride!

Life is My Highway

Montana and North Dakota have become home.... dang it lol.

These Girls

Lord help me but these babies wear me out.... they are just perfect!


Yes, it's from last winter but I adore this us....


This kid glows from the inside out... my almost 11 year old!

We are so smexy!

Favorite sport: embarrassing our kids in public


My mini-me is finding her own way in life

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Forgive Me Father, For I Have Shopped

It's been a long week and it wasn't the wisest move on my part to go online for some retail therapy. I had been doing so well with the whole not spending thing. I'm saving for a house, which we WILL eventually decide to pull the trigger on (but our cold feet is yet another entry).

So it was with very little else to do at 3 a.m. the other morning that The Man and I were huddled up around my laptop "working" on the house. See, he has made several contributions lately: new truck parts, a new 80 gallon air compressor (did you know that those things are SOOOOO handy. I totally use it to clean my household fans, dust my fake plants and dry my car mats after a wash) and more than enough tools to open our own mechanic shop. But I love him and it's part of the package.

It doesn't hurt that he also has a line item in our budget for my Barnes & Nobles habit.

So we were toying with the idea of adding a few wanted pieces to the house when I hit upon the perfect sideboard/console table. It blends well with my livingroom, it has doors on the bottom to hide the junk that usually sits under my coffee table AND it's from IKEA. Hello bargain. So it took some twisting but he did go pick it up for me Friday and then put it together, right before he went to the doctor's. Cause I'm a slave driver like that.

We have started on the den too, it's pretty well situated as it's where we watch tv and hang out. But we've been meaning to add an art/craft area for the kids. So we got a big ole table and some stools. Now I need totes or bins for organizing their stuff. But we're getting there. Oh and the air hockey table addition doesn't count, cause it was given to us.

But the addition that makes my heart sing? Well you see, I have this thing about rugs. I have a beautiful area rug that I got a super deal on (cause have you noticed how expensive rugs are?) and it's lasted years, seriously. It started out in the dining room of one house, then moved to the livingroom of another, then it was in the office/dinette area of another, then finally here, it's in the large hardwood foyer. But I wanted a rug for my kitchen, I hate hardwood in the kitchen, it's a pain in my butt. Oh and I don't do small rugs, we're talking 5x8 or bigger, it's all about atmosphere and a rug can add so much to a room.

Well I found this beauty and The Man said yes and now I'm pacing back and forth in front of my door waiting on a delivery that will probably take two or more weeks to get here.

Internet shopping isn't so good for the whole instant gratification thing huh?

Now it's different from my usual taste, but I just love the whole bubble look. Plus the colors work great for my kitchen. I'm addicted, now I'm eye-balling a rug for my landing on the stairs.....hmmm

Saturday, March 29, 2008

Croup X 2

Thank you so much for all your words of support and comfort! They help, especially when your eyes are bleeding from lack of sleep and you are still awake on a Dr. Pepper high.

Duchess has croup, which has irrated her asthma, which was in remission for almost 2 years now. Damn.

So we did the urgent care thing at our dr.'s office first thing yesterday morning. She is on meds and already showing signs of improvement. Yet I worry because the meds are steriods. Her asthma meds are steriods. This poor kid is gonna have some muscle bulk when she grows up from all the steriods that have been pumped into her little body now.

So this morning I'm putting my house back together, as it was a cluster ****.

However, I'm also fighting the croup on another front, the dr. did warn us that an adult could possible get sick from it too, and I was really expecting it to me be which is why I have been double fisting multi-vitamins.

The Man has croup.

Heaven help me, save me now. He is much worse as a patient than Duchess.

He's calling for a drink, I'm off to serve.

Send Dr. Pepper and smokes.

Friday, March 28, 2008

Duchess - the Tough

Today Duchess was feeling a little under the weather when she woke up, she had a barking cough but was content to stay home with Daddy since he was off. They hung out and at lunch when I popped in to visit her, she was bright and active. However, at 930 tonight when I was doing the final mommy sweep of the house before I crashed, I heard her talking so I ventured into her room.

My baby was burning up and talking gibberish. After waking The Man from his "coma", we gathered her up and put her in our bed, medicated and shivering even though I had three blankets on there. Finally she slept, the fever broke and we all nodded off........briefly.

At midnight, it began again, this time with her teeth chattering she was so cold and shaking, another fever had reared its ugly head. I began having panic-ed flashbacks to how very ill she was when she was younger and living in Texas where she was allergic to everything from the state flag down. Luckily, since moving to Utah, she's been healthy and whole.

The Man and I took turns cuddling her and warming her up with brisk backrubs when I realized that she was so out of it, poor baby had wet my bed. That is something we haven't seen in awhile. She realized it not long after when I was trying to change her clothes and did the freak out, I'm a big girl thing. We talked her into a bath as her body fever climbed to 102. That has been the highest we've seen thank goodness.

More meds, actually the last of the meds in the house took the edge off and she was suddenly wide awake. Hello Duchess.

We all moved downstairs and set up her mattress and "bed" on the livingroom floor while we made up the couches as to not disturb Princess, who has a test in the morning. We got some eggs and fruit into Duchess with alot of juice. Then the fever started again, it was then we realized that our thermometer was dying. A quick trip to the all night grocery store netted us a new therm, more meds, lysol, Dr. Pepper and a book for mommy.

We got the fever down once more, actually looked up the ER address just to have Duchess promise to be good if we would wait till morning. She wants to go to her doctor. She even volunteered for a shot. Can you tell my kid has spent alot of time in ER's? The mere mention of it has her in dire straights. So we're gonna try and tough it out here at home. Hysterical Duchess is not a thing I want on my hands. But I keep thinking if we got above 102.5, we're heading in, especially with her history.

So we settled in for the long night. Since I'm seeing 3 a.m. for the first time in a long time, I figure I'll stay home tomorrow and spoil my kid. Maybe take a nap, cuddle my kid and clean the living crap out of my germy house.

She's fallen asleep finally, fever down, on my couch so I'm in the princess pallet.

All in all, it's making for an interesting Thursday night. Especially since two sleep deprived parents who are not used to being awake have managed to knock over two .... I repeat two cups of Dr. Pepper onto the white carpet. Thank God for my beast.

Cheers and I'll keep you posted after our doctor run in the morning

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Universal Appeal

Last night we got off our butts and went to church. We were thrilled to find a regular Christian church in our area that we overlooked so off we went for Easter service. While the girls and I had a blast, The Man had to work and missed it, so tonight we loaded up to take the kids to dinner and then enjoy the Wednesday night service.

So off we went, we allowed Duchess to pick the food place, so of course we went to Applebees.

Now there is something you should know, in college I was once a waitress, and since then I don't get along with servers. It just never happens. I am a target for poor service.

So you can imagine my surprise when we get seated and our waitress takes our drink orders...where I find out there do not carry Coke or Dr. Pepper, hello houston we have a problem. I seriously told the kids to get in the truck, but the waitress starts listing off all these drinks and I jump on the pina colada lemonaide. I love the taste........yum. Then I thought aloud how I'd never tried any of the wild lemonaide flavors.

So it was quite the surprise when our drinks came and there were five for me. All different flavors of lemonaide, to try. The kids really dug the mango. But I commented how mine would be amazing over crushed ice, ummmmmmmmm here comes another drink over crushed ice.

Then I ordered Duchess' burger and asked for onion on the side and a knife, so I could cut the onions into little "McDonald like" baby onions. Her meal came with a side of finely diced onions. Holy moly.

When the bill came, my five drinks weren't on there, neither was my salad. In fact, the entire bill was way cheap, so I left a huge tip. As we were leaving the restuarant, our waitress about killed herself to bring me a to-go cup with pina colada lemonaide over crushed ice.

Once in the car, I was marveling over the awesome service as we headed to church.

When The Man just busted out laughing and said I had universal appeal cause that waitress had tougher shoes on than he did.

I'm glad I left a nice big ole tip, manly shoes or not.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Our memory is a tricky thing. Hindsight is 20/20 but thankfully the brain has a way of diminishing certain memories over the years. There are times that I hear a song or smell something that takes me back. Back to where I never want to be ever again.

Although I can honestly say that I would do it all again because all my history brought me to where I am, I'd do anything over to be where I am now. And be who I am. I like me.

Me then was smothered and the only time I spoke up was in my mind. Me then didn't know how to step out and break bonds that I didn't understand. Me then wasn't a horrible person in a horrible place, it just wasn't for me. I couldn't breathe.

One day, I took a step. That step turned into another step that quickly became a full blown run. That run I took, I never once looked back. I dropped it all and moved on. I don't look back now. Mainly it was a frame of mind that never fit me. I was constantly struggling against what I should be and should do.

Tonight I was washing my dishes and a song came on the radio. A song I haven't heard in years. You see music has a very strong hold on me. Instantly I was back. Not in that tight, cramped life that I was living before. I was instantly sitting in the memory of where I landed when I ran.

I was miles and miles away with only one familiar family face but it was enough. The freedom and the very essence of the air around me was sweet, oh so sweet. That song brought me right back to those first few months where I learned to be me, the me that I needed to be.

The outspoken, in your face, take no

I may have been standing in my dim kitchen washing dishes in the near dark but in my head I was sitting on a sofa in a small livingroom, a dog curled at my feet, a cig in one hand and a wine cooler in the other hand. It was dark, the windows were open to let in a big ole breeze. I remember I was wearing sweat pants and a tank top with my hair pinned up and no makeup. It was pitch black and the only light was the neon glow of the radio station numbers on the dial of the stereo. The stereo that was blaring full blast. It was so loud, I couldn't even think other than the lyrics of the song. Cause that's how I roll.

In my heart I was waiting for someone to say something about it but it never came. I took several deep breaths and realized that I was getting there. I was gonna be okay, I was gonna be me. I sat there for hours, rolling through song after song. It was one of the best nights of my life.

That night might seem small or silly in a way, but for me it was the beginning of my taking control of my life.

Damn I'm enjoying the ride.

Today I've been busy as it's end of quarter and some people have yet to learn that when I say expense reports are due, by God I meant COB today, so it's been a little bit of a long day.

But I was part of a great conversation today.......

1. It is a religious thing?
2. Are you leaving early for a funeral?
3. Isn't it uncomfortable?
4. Are you goth?
5. Are you depressed?

and my personal favorite,

6. Can I touch it?

the "thing" in question was a beautiful cross necklace that I have that is nice sized and looks quite alot like a rosary.......except it ain't cause I'm Baptist.

But the locals around here were quite fascinated by it....and put off by it

More so than the fact that I wear all black almost everyday I work.......

No, I'm not goth, black is slimming and it takes no time to "match" an outfit. I like to think it's a brilliant move on my part.


Saturday, March 22, 2008

Things are moving at warp speed over here, it's Easter already, the easter paraphernalia is all tucked away in my trunk. But we've managed to survive a busy week...

1. Annual investors meeting - me

2. Another work get together - The Man plus fam

3. Leaving the work get together early due to emails from work - me

4. Ballet rehersals starting for Alice in Wonderland, she's a card - Princess

5. Deciding that she wants to know all about science, cause she's behind - Duchess

6. Painting two beautiful abstract art canvas' - girls

7. Finishing up the rebuilding on fuel injectors - me, lol gotcha - The Man

8. Purchasing new wheels and lugnuts after an agonizing search - The Man

9. Food poisoning from undercooked Brats - The Man

10. birthday party for friend - Duchess

11. Woke up early this morning by someone handing over keys to go buy gift - me

12. Frantic trip to W-world for gift and toothpaste - me

13. Cooking appetizers for get together - me

14. Fourteen loads of laundry in three days - me and Princess

15. Spilling bubbles all over self and then turning into a human bubble wand in the wind -Duchess

16. Joined after school homework club - Princess

17. Prepping for school - The Man

18. Cleaned out fridge to find 7 different experiments growing - me

19. Forced to take out trash immediately after - The Man

20. Vacummed, shampoo-ed and washed car - me though I forced everyone else to help

21. Read story about toliet that grew to woman's bum and got physically sick - me

There is still a day and a half left in our week, I'm just plain scared.....

Thursday, March 20, 2008

The Secret to a Long Happy Marriage?

Last night I was laying in bed reading yet another trashy romance novel, trying to stay awake and wait on The Man to come to bed. Finally, I went downstairs to check and see what was taking him so long. He'd been waiting on a part for his truck so he could put the manifold back together, so that is where we was. In the garage with the heaters blaring, music making the windows in the garage pump to the beat with his torque wrench. God it was hot.......anyway,

I did the whole whiny thing, I can't sleep till you come to bed and I'm exhausted, hurry up. When he looks up at me with a huge smile on his face, ignoring my whine, he goes,

"I just saved us alot of money"

True enough and he didn't even switch to Geico. No, the rebuild of his fuel injectors was quoted at 1300 dollars. Damn, but by doing it himself with a little help from his friend, we spent a grand total of 102 dollars.

So he was a happy duck.

But as I was drifting off to sleep I wondered, could that be what makes our marriage work?

I know couples who fight like naked, oiled up gladiators over money. But The Man and me, we made a deal before our wedding that we would never fight about money. It wasn't easy and there were times that we had to stop mid-fight and walk away, but we've never fought over money. We budget, I say yes you can buy it or no you can't, here is why. If I show him a budget and go, we have the money, can I get this? And he says no, I don't get it........I may or may not whine until he gives in later but I follow the unspoken rule.....You back each other's play.

So here I am going yeah, saving money makes our marriage happy.............

Like how he is so handy and saves us all this money rebuilding his truck constantly. Even when it runs just fine and I can't tell the difference (starting to think this is a hobby of his....) it's okay cause he saved us money.

Or how our work schedules work out pretty darn well so we save money by not needing full time after school care for the girls.

Or how I am such a good shopper that I can go shop for work clothes or kid clothes and come home with a receipt that says on the bottom, you've saved 247.25 (I swear, I spent like 60)

Or how I can find the perfect pair of heels for work on the clearance rack 75% off, the one diamond in the rough

Maybe I should point out that I am notorious for "arguing" my way into discounts too, maybe I shouldn't though cause that is not really a good quality........hee hee

So in the end, I'm laying there as these thoughts build and I turned over and whispered to him "We're so happy together cause we always save money" he popped right back with "okay, so there are these wheels that I want for my truck..........."

Sigh.........lucky me, he is getting them for a GREAT deal, so he's saving me money.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Wordless Wednesday

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Just Call Me Jane Bond, 007

Okay, the best part about Friday's spa day was the vinchy shower thta was apart of my treatment. Besides having a very sweet, very mute lady scrub the ever loving hell out of my body, the absolute bliss of this shower was the bomb.
You're laying covered in steaming warm towels on a table with a great waterproof pillow, this 6 foot shower thingy, swings out and water in various temps and rythems, wash all the nasty dried ski and scrubby goop away. Other than the fact that it was so hot it brought tears to my eyes (which is saying something as I tend to look like a lobster after a shower) it was amazing.
Until they rubbed the massage oil on, cause holy hell, I lost 2 layers of toughen up rough rhino skin apparently (sorry TMI) cause that crap burned and I'm still sore.
It was a nice pampering though, and when I added a tip to the company's bill, I about lost my complimentary breakfast and juice, there is no way in hell I'm paying someone to torture me like that. Not that kind of money and I'll keep the rhino skin.
Otherwise it was lovely. (Picky little sh*t, aren't I?)

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Naked, Oiled up and Snow

That is the name of my new band. No, seriously that is my dilemma tomorrow. It's the companies annual ski trip, except I don't ski. Hmmmm, so they gave me spa credit instead. Oh geez I think I can manage that.......if I have to.

So I get up early, drive up the mountain to the lodge, spend a couple hours in the spa and then curled in front of a fireplace waiting on the skiers to come in for lunch. We all lunch together, have a lovely time (while I die from not having had a ciggie in hours) and then after lunch, they go on and ski some more and I go shopping, I mean.......I go home.

Except, the spa is stupid and thinks it the pooh, so a simple manicure is really outrageous. So I figured I'd get more bang for their buck by picking a procedure.

Get this, the chick that hates to be naked, is getting a body polish.

First off, I had to call and ask what a body polish is, apparently they exfoliate your entire body, massage oils into you and then do the whole hair/face thing. Okay, sounds good. Until I get my reminder call today that reminds me that since I'll be naked I might want to bring socks to keep me warm.


Hey, any of you with money who visit spas, could you tell me if this is normal or are they getting freaky with it.

So I'll be naked, oiled up and then it's snowing all weekend. Dang.

For tonight: To Do
1. Shave
2. Buy a good book
3. Map out my trip
4. Pack socks
5. Pack mask so I can't see them see me naked
6. Pray for an old lady technician
7. Double check the shaving, can't shame myself

I'll bring pics back

Of the snow, skiers and lodge, not me naked and oiled, I promise

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Not on Crack, I promise

So once again, I have managed to make myself the talk of the neighborhood.

Yesterday was just pure hell, let's start there, that will help you understand my frame of mind. I was the only exec admin on staff (for two days mind you) the others were on vacation, they suck! We had temps covering phones and other little stuff but everything else was on me. I was like a tornado through the office. Dropping things off, arranging travel, setting meetings, talking to lawyers about contracts, oh and reading my email. All that important stuff that I normally do for seven really nice men, it usually keeps me pretty busy. Except now, I was doing it for 30 people. Pass the pipe.

The game plan was that since my mom is back in town, she'd pick up the girls (cause she missed them, and they missed her, take them please...they want their Mims, probably has nothing to do with the fact that there is always chocolate at your house either) and take them home with her for dinner and I'd swing by around oh say 7 and pick them up. Since The Man is working, that means I'd have some Hope4Grace time. Woohoo........2 hours of quiet bliss, to be honest, I was gonna take a nap. I really needed a nap.

Instead at 4 I get a call that my mom's car has given up the ghost and she is about a mile from my house but still 8 miles from the girls after school care. Crap. When the call came in, I was on one line rationally talking to our lawyer, had another line on hold from where I was yelling at the American Express lady and there was somebody sitting in a chair at my desk, patiently waiting their turn. My poor mom was ready to shoot her car, seriously she packs. But there was nothing I could do, except call and wake up the sleeping Man early and beg him to fix it. Whatever it is, just fix it. He got up and called my mom, told her don't shoot the car or light it on fire, he was on his way.

So I'm working and trying to get things ironed out so I can leave for the day when I get the call. The car isn't getting gas. He had to push it to my garage with his truck, truck 1 - car 0. So he took my mom to pick up the kids while I rush home to make him something to eat and pack his lunch. It's a whirlwind on any given day we both work but yesterday was nut insane.

So after much back and forth, we get him fed (left over stuffed salmon, am I the woman or what?) and then I pack his lunch fresh out of the crockpot, potroast with yummy garlic potatoes and a huge salad with pepperonis. Then it's time for his carpool to arrive, it's his week to drive. So in between hugging my mom, yelling at my kids that they could still have pizza, saved from her car, and try and get him out the door. Oh and I believe I was also unloading the dishwasher.

When bam.....he comes running back inside and says, we're taking &&&&&'s truck cause mine won't crank, forgot to tighten the whatchamacallit bolt. Later.

WTF? Two dead vehicles in my driveway, oh the HOA is gonna love this.

So I run after him and notice that his truck IS NOT in the driveway but on the street, here we go people......

I caught him before they drive off and I said if the towtruck shows up do you want me to shoot it? He said no, just the driver. Laughing I waved him off.

Mom, the girls and I had a lovely dinner, we took her home and waved her off.

Upon arriving home, we finally relaxed and got some homework done, the kitchen clean and then all vegged out on my bed. As it neared our bedtime, I realized that since I was unused to parking outside the garage, I'd probably left my car unlocked. So in my pjs, I ran downstairs, grabbed my keys and headed out the front door to beep my locks.

Except parked out on the street was a farking tow truck.......

In a sheer state of panic, because anyone who knows The Man knows that if they'd have towed his truck, he'd have burned the HOA clubhouse to the ground, I rushed next door to my neighbor, who just happens to be the HOA pres.

In my pjs........with furry slippers

Pjs that consist of a low scoop neck tank top and baggy pants that I'm constantly pulling back in place. To the neighbors house, dressed like this.

I banged on his door till he opened it and all I could say in my state of panic was....

"Are you f***ing kidding me?"

He blinked, looked down at my pjs, looked up again swiftly (old fart) reddened and then recognized me for the loony bat that lives next to him.

After a brief conversation he realized that I thought he'd called and was having my husband's truck towed, he actually turned white, even whiter than he was before. The Man has quite a way with words and he's unleased on this poor bastard many of times, so I shouldn't have been surprised.

He killed himself to assure me that he didn't call it, and that most importantly he would never tow anything that belonged to The Man, ever.

At this point, I calmed down enough to actually breathe and the old guy and me stood and watched the tow truck tow away somebodies car out of their driveway. We decided it was a repo. He said he'd have to let the HOA board know about that, I told him it wasn't his business, he told me goodnight.

So I put babies to bed and then with evil delight sent The Man an email at work that was guaranteed to blow his lid and sure enough at 12:30 a.m. I got the call, he was yelling and carrying on, till I explained and then it was the typical, male response......

Today, I'm striving for normal. Let's see how that works for me.

Saturday, March 8, 2008

My secret is out.....

Admit it, you were a little un-nerved by the addition of music to my site. I was thrilled to discover this, obviously it's been around for a while but I rarely venture out for new blog thingys, cause I am very content with the appearance of my blog, oh and I'm lazy.

But I was stoked to be able to set custom music to my site.

Have you noticed my very strange, very eclectic taste in music? Yeah, I'm a freak.

But if there is anything that will crack the vault on my soul and allow you a peek inside, it's my music. I live my life to music. It's available in every room of my house, it's in my car, on my phone, docked at my desk, literally everywhere I go, it's to music.

So browse through, enjoy some Dropkick Murphy (from the movie the Departed, with the oh so yummy Matt Damon)........bang your know you want to......

Rock out with some Seger.....oh baby, there is nothing like a good Seger song, and by the way "Like A Rock" doesn't make me think of a truck commercial like most, it's THE MAN all the way baby, he is totally that song......sigh........

Luke Bryan is just sassy (can a guy be sassy?) anyway, this totally is the perfect description of the brief crazy dating game before The Man, thank god he swooped in and ran off all other suiters.

Now Jason Aldean is amazing in concert, that boy is just good. Play yourself that "Johnny Cash" song and see if you don't just want to flip off your boss and jump in the car, I do......

Cross Canadian Ragweed, well there is so much to say about those rebel boys, but know this, they have been the soundtrack of my marriage. We've been fans that long. We're just loyal like that. My ringtone for sometime was the Boys From Oklahoma song, I must say that it ruined my professional image at that job. Noone would believe that the stuff, cold, mean dragon admin of the boss would play that unless her arse was a country redneck, dang......ruined my imagine I tell you.

Now did you guess that I'm a HUGE Rocky fan? Well there you have it.........I am. I have all the movies (except 5, cause I roll like that) and damn, I don't care of that man is older than dirt, it just works for me. Almost like Matt Damon and Leo in the Departed, opps mentioned that already huh?

And for the uber country side I got some farmer songs, some twangers and such in there. But hey, I warned you that being in my head was a little odd.

So what's your favorite song?

Friday, March 7, 2008

Mom Takes Control.......

Meet my daughter, Princess. She's nine and the love of my life. Just as sassy as her momma and she loves ballet and now choir too. She has quite the schedule, although she is never home alone. She bounces back and forth between activities often and keeps us hopping. Then there are the stressful days that one thing runs late or the bus runs late and my world just falls apart. Cause this is my first baby, so I tend to panic...........but not nearly as much as The Man. Which is why you see her holding that cute little baby, red cell phone.

Rather than stick a homing pigeon on her somewhere, we added a child phone to our new cell service. IT HAS GPS, we want her comfortable with the idea of being tracked daily, lol. Luckily The Man's company has an amazing discount so we all three got new phones and last night was set up. So once we got her "child-parent" program set up, I was dancing the happy dance all over my house. See, I was able to restrict all incoming/outgoing calls on her phone to only people in her contacts. Then I was able to set a password of my chosing on her contacts. Then I was able to block all texting and messages of any kind. I love technology. This phone is now fit for my nine year old. OH and did I mention it has GPS? Yeah, see I can log in on my phone or at work and find her anytime. And if she leaves the radius I've set up I get a text message that she is on the move. Again, I love technology.

Now this was all The Man's plan. I was extremely hesitant to arm my nine year old with a cell phone. Because hello, she is nine, I was 26 before I had one. But as The Man pointed out, if the technology is available and it provided us a sense of safety for her and gave her a way to keep in contact, it was worth it. Oh and the best part, her whole deal only costs me 9.99 a month. Hello deep discount, I love you. Besides, this is a great jump into the whole big girl responsibility thing. Not to mention, I got to lay out alot of rules, I love rules. I rock at them, as long as I'm making them and not having to abide by them.......then ummm it doesn't work so well.
So after we got all set up and the kiddos went to bed. The Man and I decided to have some dirty fun........perv, not that........

We decided to destroy the cells we had for the past two years from the crappiest service I've ever had in my life. Tossing them away just wasn't good enough......

Pardon me, I was ready for bed.......and since it's 12 degrees out in my dirty garage (he's cleaning it today, I swear.....he's been building toolbenches again) I had on everything of The Man's I could find.........but I got to hammer the crap out of my previous piece of crap phone.

Another angle shot........this was serious business.........

Cause I hate them and obviously The Man and I are very literal people, cause they told us to destroy the phones.........I wonder if this is what they meant.........damn that was fun.

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Just Because.....

Why in the world would anyone have this much jambalaya on hand? Well my momma made it to thank the "boys" for helping her move. Said "boys" were at my house, helping The Man rebuild a part of his what-cha-ma-call-it, you know, under his hood.
So I came home to this...................damn!!!!!!!! There is nothing, well hardly nothing, I love more in this world than to catch The Man in action doing his hobby, rebuilding his hunting rig.

1. He's intense......
2. He's sweaty....
3. Come on, do I need a 3?

He isn't afraid of getting dirty, I so dig this. Don't give me no momma's boy who can't change his own oil, I'll take my man who fixes everything I break and more....

See, the what-cha-ma-call-it in person.......and one of his buddies who came over to assist, and to eat jambalaya.....really, they love to eat at my house......they line up to volunteer, we had so many show up for this that there was one person just to hold the light.

Till they all ate and then got tired and went home. And The Man needed to reach this one little part to put the bad boy back together again. This is what I found. For some reason, I think this is the cutest picture ever.... although I remember accusing him of being too intimate with his truck at this point.
This was the look I got after that.........hee hee

And for no reason what so ever, this is what was waiting on me yesterday when I got home from work. He was running around frustrated with dinner and kids and the phone kept ringing and I walk into all that drama to see this.......just because......
I'm adding just because to my list of reasons why I like him so very much. Right under sweaty when working on truck.

Monday, March 3, 2008

Are you ready for this?

Sooooooooooooooo I got a new look. I think it makes me look younger, The Man really seems to (ummmm) like it. The kids agree it's hot and Princess has changed her mind about the mom hair thing.......

What's your verdict, am I too old to carry this off?

Sunday, March 2, 2008

Irony is A B****

The Lord has a way of arranging things where I end up eating my words, oh and learning a lesson. This is really an important part of my life, you would think I would pay attention and beware what I let come out of my mouth. Nope, not got there yet.

After all my writings and purging about being anti-social and not needing new friends. I think I've ended up with three new ones. The thought hit me yesterday. Wow, I really aught to sit down and ponder the universe more often.

See Friday night after work, we had a thing.

The Man's coworker, who is in his carpool, his wife's birthday was this weekend so he threw her a party. We pretty much had to attend too. Cause their oldest is Duchess' bestest friend from daycare, who no longer attends daycare at the same place. So it was mentioned in the invite that they wanted Duchess to come over for an official playdate the next day, Saturday. But no times were discussed between the two men, why was I surprised? So we needed to firm it up, plus everyone from The Man's work world would be there........oh and we've bagged out of like three work events lately.

So we went.

I came home from work, changed clothes a million times like the neurotic idiot that I am, then finally decided that I would wear an all black outfit with my pearls and throw my hair up on my head, cause it's a confidence builder. See I suck at interacting with other people........I totally needed the boost. Now keep in mind I've come a long way, in the old days I would sit underneath The Man's left arm the entire night. Or I would discreetly follow him room to room and make his life miserable. I'm starting to come out of my shell I think.

So on the way, we stop off for some flowers for the birthday girl, cause what else to do you take? Nothing? No way, not a southern it was a nice bouquet of lilies. Roses just aren't' appropriate. Then we head out, except they live in the boonies, further than me by like 20 miles and we could see their neighborhood when the main road was closed off due to flooding, the detour was another 15 miles out of the way. Holy heck, just shoot me now. The Man kept glancing over at me cause I'm sure the fumes rolling off my head just said, I'm so over this, I will make you pay........poor guy.

But we finally get there, with both kids asleep in the backseat, me starving cause I missed lunch and The Man resigned to a pissy evening dodging his angry wife. We finally find the house and park and as we walk up the co-worker is manning the grill. He's nice and welcoming and directs us on in their new house. (which I loved!!!! But I digress) Upon entering the front room, I stopped short, the house was farking packed. I don't know how I forgot that almost everyone from The Man's company lives in this neighborhood so since there was only three extra cars outfront, doesn't mean that the rest of these meatheads didn't walk. OMG, I started sweating.

I kissed my kids and didn't see much of them for the rest of the night. Just the occassional blur as they ran by, happy to have playmates. The Man immediately made his way through, calling everyone's name, slapping back and shaking hands. While me, I walked all the way in, put my purse down and turned to survey the room. When I was grabbed from behind in a big ole hug by C. Now C and I have been shopping together, hung out a little but I never call her, I just never think of it, but C and I immediately start in with the "You've lost weight bitch and you look great" routine, cause we both have. As we're catching up, I catch the eye of the hostess, who I have met twice, spoke to once and couldn't remember her name for nothing. So C saves the day and helps out, then promises to come back in a few, she had to go kick her man's arse in fooseball. Ummmm okay.

I chatted with the hostess and gave her th e flowers, then we each made plates and moved to the kids' table which was the only open seating. Now the division was there, the wives that were tight never spoke to anyone else. The venders and their wives kept to themselves and the coworkers did the same, it was the strangest division. But as I sit stuffing my face talking to S the hostess, she totally nailed me.

"I haven't seen you since November when we ran into each other at the grocery store"

Crap, called out..........

"Um yeah, I kinda hang to myself......"

At this point, K jumps in with her baby, who I've actually seen since Christmas as we had dinner at her house once, she is a doll.

K- "Yeah Hope4Grace is anti-social, she flat out told me to call and tell her when it was her turn to host dinner, cause she wouldn't call me"

OMG, am I really that bad?

S- "I've heard that about you, but it's okay. I hate people too........"

Ummm awkward.....

So we're all chatting and eating and the husbands join us with food and The Man totally set me up and sent me out in a boat all by myself.......

The Man- "You have to pin Hope4Grace down into a time and date or you'll never get anywhere, just call her at work and make sure it gets in her calendar. Otherwise she'll forget and find a way out. She rather be at home in her pjs reading a book."

Death was in the air. Just a whiff but it was there.

The two women looked at each other and nodded like this wasn't news to them (hey, they don't know me) and then pounced.

Both- "Well we like you so you're gonna get out of your house. Very soon"

OH SHIT...........

I then really tired to tell them that I was a horrible friend and it wasn't worth their time. They thought that was hysterical. OH not good.........

Needless to say, during the evening I was with C or K or S through out the evening. We chatted about everything that women do. We toured S's new house. Ohhhh over her paint colors and bathroom fixtures, I totally made mental notes.

Then as the evening was winding down it found us seating around the dining room table eating cake. There were three other women seated there too, just politely listening as C and I both have a nasty habit of quoting movie lines. So it was getting quite ridiculous!

Then I did it, I totally said the most inappropriate thing I could.

The conversation turned to how long we'd all been married and surprise surprise The Man and I were at the top of the list. After explaining to another wife that I really like my man and it wasn't an accident (how rude to ask) I went on to say that I was stoked about marrying young and having my babies early cause when Duchess graduates I'd still be young, only -------- (not going there).

When C, licking ice cream off her spoon, announced well I'm 38 and I'm still hot, so you'll totally still be all the rage.

The room went completely silent. Noone could believe that C was 38. Her man is quite younger and mouths were dropped all around the table. Except me, cause I already new this.

So I opened my mouth to say something as I saw the stream rising off her head, C is not going to sit back and just take this.

So quoting from a movie that I can't remember the title, but yet remember the exchange perfectly, as obsure as it is. Two women were commisserating at a bar, feeling sorry for themselves cause they had no men.

Me to C: I'd still F*** ya, your totally hot.

C (recognizing the quote instantly): OMG, I'd F*** you too, there's hope for us.......

The rest of the room was in utter shock. One woman got up and left the table, grabbed her hubs and left the party. S went behind her waving her off between gasping for air. She thought that was hysterical. C and I both went looking for our men, to be the first to let them know. and K, well she was still sitting at the table all shocked looking.

So I ran The Man down and told him, where he promplty laughed his head off, called me a bad example and hugged me before sending me back in the mix. C's husband was like you're never living this down, ever. But otherwise they know us, so they were not surprised.

So we all sat back down where S announced that it was the best party she'd ever had, even though people were bailing like rats from a drowning ship. When K finally piped up, "well it's nice that you guys are so hot, but what about me, who'd F*** me?"

Okay, should have realized then that I had made some new friends. Geez........I even sat around adding their cells to my phone. AND we set up the playdate for the next day and we all made tenative plans to meet at my house on Sunday to do some hair stuff. Cause K is a wizard at hair even though she's now an accountant. Brains, gotta love that.

It shouldn't have shocked me so but I had to call my girl in Okie last night. One of my longest friendships ever, to break the news. Sweetie, I have a new friend, no, take that back, I think I have three.

I can't tell you all the names she called me, then we caught up and gave advice and laughed while I cleaned toliets and it was all better again.

Anti-social might be moving off the grid. I'll keep you posted.