Southern girl plowing her way through life making the rules up as she goes. Warning: likes to bake, curse, quote movies/literature, is tattooed, married to The Man and mother of two girls. We bring new meaning to the "griswald way of life". Come along for the ride!

Life is My Highway

Montana and North Dakota have become home.... dang it lol.

These Girls

Lord help me but these babies wear me out.... they are just perfect!


Yes, it's from last winter but I adore this us....


This kid glows from the inside out... my almost 11 year old!

We are so smexy!

Favorite sport: embarrassing our kids in public


My mini-me is finding her own way in life

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Do as I say...

Although we were running 10 minutes behind this morning, the girls managed to make my day. This was overheard at 5:55 a.m. this morning:

P: You're almost four, sit down. I'm teaching you to tie your own shoes.

D: Okay.

P: Now you stuff the sock in there and squish it on, no, stop moving. Like this. See.

D: No, your hand is in my way!

P: Here, watch, like this, make a bunny, loop the other one around the bunny's neck (can you tell that The Man taught her to tie her shoes?) and then pull tight.

D: Where's the bunny?

P: No, not a bunny, like this, watch... If you do it right, you're shoelaces will NEVER come undone. Mine stay like this all day, cause I'm big.

D: But (name).....But

P: No, listen, like this, watch the loop...

D: But....

P: No, you have to watch, your not watching....

D: (name)!!!!!


D: Your shoelace is undone.

P: (looks down at undone shoelace on foot) Well crap!

I think it's official. The correct children came home from the hospital with us. No baby switchs here.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Happy Tuesday

Several noteworthy things going on around here:

1. Managed to keep kids in car while running errands for several hours without hair pulling, screaming and such. They brought every baby in the house and proceeded to strap them in the middle seat for the trip.

2. The Man is on his next to last trip in the Navy. Woohoo. He brought me flowers to mark the special occassion.

3. Oedipus paper returned: Ancient greek dustball 0, happy paper writer 1

4. The job that The Man wants so bad........ no word yet, should have heard by now, but no word, pray people pray.

5. One big sock fight between The Man and Princess, only one bruised eye.

6. Mom, I love you. You rock, but stop a farging comment already! :)

7. MM if you have made it this far, I'm so proud of you!!

Sunday, November 26, 2006

Random Thoughts From this Weekend...

Well we've had a great holiday weekend. We all had four fabulous days off. Strange, this is the first day that we actually got anything accomplished! Here's our brief summary and some thoughts:

Fri: slept till 10 am. Missed Black Friday, pity.

Sat: Got up, made coffee run and then realized that Penney's still had sale going, sweet. Hit Penney's for some clothes for girlies. I rock. Managed to hide them upstairs without Princess catching me this time.

Sat: Realized that we've yet to give notice. Opps. Base housing hates that. So off I go to give notice at 1100. Great, The Man being the active duty guy has to do the paperwork. Problem Houston, The Man is camped out watching BEDLAM.

Sidenote: If you are not from OK and do NOT follow college ball, OU verses OSU every single year. It is the biggest game in the state and The Man does not move from tv for hours. Hence the above picture, the girls were all over him but being the great dad he is, he just moved to the floor to give them room. WHILE NOT MISSING ONE FRAME OF THAT GAME!

Dutchess spent all of Saturday dressed as Tinkerbell but insisting that she was an otter. Okaaaaaaay. This is only enhanced by catching her "hanging out" in the potty doing her thing while reading the toy circular from a local store. That was priceless but couldn't find the camera so you are spared that sight. You can thank me now.

Sun: Well Princess and I are the only ones up. We're cooking red beans and rice! Yum. Still attempting to get top off of stove so can clean. Really got to start getting this house ready for turnover. Stove is stubborn. Have WD40 ready to go, but need top off stove. YES, WD40 is the best, cleanest way to clean your stove top, HOWEVER please take top off stove and put in backyard before applying it, otherwise you may blow your house up. Friendly tip there. Opps, banged on stove too much, The Man has awoke, dang, I hate when that happens. :)

Friday, November 24, 2006

The Great Big Book of Nothing

Well thanksgiving has been eaten, kitchen cleaned three times and we won't even go into the naps. But we made it through, The Man was actually home for a holiday so it was great! Black Friday has found me working on school work. Since I'm a firm believer in the "if I need it that bad, I'd rather pay full price than shop with idiots" approach to Christmas shopping, we were homebodies today. I managed to get some baseboards cleaned (okay, the kids did that part, they love it, I swear they adore cleaning baseboards while eating suckers) and do some laundry but the marjority of my day has been reading and doing essays on Oedipus. Wow, this book it historical soap opera at it's best. However, after getting through the play I had six one page essays to write. Six different ideas, Six different themes. Yeah so I get four done. IT TOOK ALL FARGING DAY! I take a nice break (4.5 hour naps rock!) and when I log back in to the rest of my essays, I see that the teacher has reduced the amount of essays we need. Tonight is the deadline and she waits till this afternoon to change it from six to four. Yep, I still have two to go. I feel very cheated. :(

Warning: Pity party ahead.......Not only did I work hard on this but now I don't even get credit. The Man left the room and locked himself up with football so I have no one to listen to me moan. Crap.

My 4.5 hour nap was great, except I had a dream that was stuck on loop and kept rolling through my head. Stanley, from Playhouse Disney Channel, singing the "Great Big Book of Everything" over and over. Except he was holding a copy of Oedipus. This is very disturbing. Not only is the song stuck in my head, but I STILL have essays to write.
I need a Dr. Pepper and a hersey.

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Most Thankful For:

The things I'm most thankful for:

Duchess telling George (the IKEA Giraffe) what for!

Princess shows off her constant companion, Mr. IDOG

The Man who makes ham that will make you cry.

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

June Cleaver I'm Not?

My children love music. They are more apt to jam out to their cd's than watch television. I have them listening to everything from Barbara Mandrell, to ABBA, to Disney. I should have known that they would pick up some music taste from The Man as well.

Last year my mom got my precious children their very own sophisticated karoke machine. Dual mics, great sounds, portable... yep she is the ulitmate grandmother! However, they used it occassionally and then lost the mics. Last night the mics surfaced. We sent the kids upstairs to get ready for bed around 730, me trailing behind dragging blankets and clean clothes to put away. As I'm piling clothes in the upstairs hall closet, I notice the wall moving. The bass on that machine was up on high and they were rocking. I open the door to hear my four year old sing this:

Well I gathered up all my guns
And a pipe bomb just for fun
And I drove to her house and parked on the lawn
That's right I always was a crazy one.
Well her boyfriend was sure nice to me
Said calm down would you like a drink
And then I shot him full of holes
From his nose to his knees

It went like this from there:

"Husbanddddddddddddd, GET UP HERE!"

The Man runs from downstairs, thinking that the girls have killed me or something, "WHAT?"

"Look at YOUR children"

Pause while they restart the song, they moved down off the bed to center stage for more room to shake their tushies, Princess upped the bass and off they went. I stood there watching horrified with my hand over my mouth waiting for my husband to get indigent and livid!

Because as proper parents, June or Walt Cleaver-ish, we should, right?

Nope, The Man is grinning ear to ear as he turns to me and says, "Our kids are cool. They love Reckless Kelly!"

Crap, does this mean I'm a bad parent? Can I still be June Cleaver?

Sunday, November 19, 2006

Ah, Broken Promises

I have broken a promise. This should bother me; it doesn't. I will admit I'm paying for it, but it was worth it. Oh it was heavenly!

I promised The Man that I would follow Dr's orders and not have
A. Caffeine
B. Chocolate
C. Anything rich/high-carb
D. Work out 4 times a week
Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

Now, I'm gonna go pop two tummy pills and take a nice soak in the tub. However, three English papers down (one A, two ungraded....) and work up the energy to begin the next one.

Spitting Mad.....

Senior Democrat renews call for military draft

As a military wife, I think I have some ground here to talk. But I will just say that I support my President, I support the troops, I will not say that I agree 100% with policy though. I believe that the US can not be the big brother to every country out there who can not to it themselves. I believe in removing evil and corruption, but at some point, someone has to stand up and say "WE WILL NOT DO THIS FOREVER FOR YOU!".

Stepping off my soapbox now. Thank you. Have a lovely Sunday.

Saturday, November 18, 2006

Speak English?

Updated from last Thursday: I needed pics to emphasis!
Today I actually left work early to go to a doctor's appointment. Yeah, new tummy pills, woohoo! Maybe these will actually work. Of course, my new doctor is in an area of town that I've never driven. So I get lost. Not a little lost but alot lost.

My insurance people were so kind and sent me the doctor's phone number and address on a handy, "Don't forget your appointment Sweetie" letter. So I did the whole gooooogle maps thing and off I went. IN PLENTY OF TIME! So there I am lost. Can't find this place. The address is a yet-to-be-completed condo highrise and I get turned around. Soooo, I am on the cell, calling the office to be told by Ms. Prissy (why do they put the snotty people on the phone first?) that they are not at that location, they upgraded to a nice new building with underground parking, two miles away.

So I make a nifty right onto the next street (10 minutes till We-had-to-reschedule-your-appointment-b/c-you-were-late time)and off I go. I see my street coming up, so I turn on my blinker as nothing was coming and started to whip into the street. Out of nowhere, I hear brakes lock up and a horn go off immediately behind my left ear. Now, if you're driving on a two way street and you make a left turn, do you check over YOUR left shoulder? NO! Complete idiot driver in one of the lunchbox thingys (have no clue what they are but they look like my kids lunchbox on wheels) then skids next to me.
So I hit my brakes and veer towards the side of the street, narrowly missing the dang fire hydrant. This guy keeps going up on onto the sidewalk and then stops two feet from a building.

The people in the nearby bus stop shelter are screaming at him and me (I did nothing wrong here people)! So I jump out and see this man with his head on the steering wheel. Now, we did not hit each other and we did not hit anything else. So I run up and knock on his window, thinking he had a heart attack, hope, idiot was breathing hard and about to pass out. Then starts yelling at me in a foreign language! (Now, don't get me wrong, I have nothing against people who speak other languages, personally I'm jealous cause I think I'd be much cooler if I did. Plus my husband's family is study German stock that comes full German speaking aunts at Thanksgiving and Christmas, but they speak English too.........)
HELLO! Speak English! We live in America, English is our language. Don't curse me out in a foreign language, take the time to put it in English so I know how and what curses to reply with (Lord forgive me). A cop joins the party and traffic starts to back up. Cop turns to me and goes, "Did you hit the foreign guy?" Dude, the foreign guy was on my left when I was in the far lane making a left hand turn, hello......two way street.

Cop proceeds to nod, then a few bystanders (gossip must have been slow, people were getting out of their cars at this point to join the fun and comments on idiot, who was STILL yelling at me from inside his lunchbox in a foreign language!) Finally someone starts to talk to the idiot in his native tongue, and the translator tells me and cop (who was writing something on paper at this point, YIPES) that idiot thinks I should be taken off the road b/c women can't drive.

OH MY MERCY, I showed my butt. My mother would be so proud of me, I called that man everything but a foreigner and then some (Lord, please stop reading here). I even threw his momma in there at some point. When the cop finally got me to shut up, I was so red and my heart was racing. Cop looks over cars and sends me on my way. Idiot was waving his arms around inside the lunchbox and cop couldn't understand him a bit, so cop left. (Pic to left is what I imagine I looked like at this point)

Needless to say, my car is fine, I'm fine. The idiot in the lunchbox that DOES NOT SPEAK ONE WORD OF ENGLISH but has a legal driver's license is still roaming the streets. By the time I get to the doctor's, I'm so freaking mad that I was barely able to park in the tiny underground parking garage that is the ONLY space to park in their NEW building and make my way upstairs. 20 minutes late and the snotty chick took one look at my red face and asked for my id and told me to sit, they'd send me back in a sec. YES!

Finally, something went my way. Until I left the parking garage, where an older lady in broken Spanish informed me that I couldn't leave the garage without paying the parking fee of $8. Here we go again.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

I can't beat this...

Was intending to write tonight and then I went and read up on Tuna. I can't beat this. So I'm gonna go to bed now. Enjoy!

Sunday, November 12, 2006

Baths, Organic and More

I have bathed more today than most people should. Ever. The girls and I have branched out into bath salts and body scrubs. So the guinea pig (ME) had to try a sample of ever type that came out. I've soaked in sweet orange salts, peppermint salts and apple salts. Then I have scrubbed with cinnamon, orange and peppermint scubs.

I have also been hungry most of the day. May or may not have been due to the yummy smells coming from my kitchen. We did manage to get some cute soaps done today too but man, the salts won hands down. So far, I haven't changed colors, broke out in a rash or died from poisoning so I'm gonna say that these babies are safe for public use. Woohoo, Christmas shopping will be done soon! However, I'm extremely dry and pruny, but managed to get all my manditory reading done for English class while "trying" out the soaks. Not bad for a day's work!

Saturday, November 11, 2006

City Spawl or Wide Open Spaces

Well we're knee deep in the job hunt. The Man has one next week that is in the middle of no-where. The hunter and woodsman in him is screaming YES YES YES! However, a local job is looking good too. We're hoping that the decision is made for us (i.e. one offers and one doesn't) but we have to prepare for the idea that we may have to choose between city and country. The Man is hands down country and for most parts so am I, but there is always that doubt. However, yeah the country sounds really good. It's where I'm from, where I like to be and where I want my girls raised. So I guess it's not that much of a decision.

The girls are on a roll. They are soap making queens. Tonight we're gonna make our first batch of scrubs. The mix smells good enough to eat, which is probably why we're still up and baking cookies! If only I'd walk instead of eat this late at night.

At what age do you stop cleaning their rooms and make them take over? Duchess and I are at the beginning of a long uphill battle regarding her end of the palace. After climbing over a chair, a rolled up rug (?), two dozen baby dolls and a doll bed, I finally reached her closet to put away her clothes. Enough is enough, I need advice!! How do you enforce this!

Wednesday, November 8, 2006

In the Zone

While doing my daily drop offs of the kids, I pass a park everyday, there for the last week has been a woman jogging as I go by. Every morning, she's so diligent. She runs slowly on the tips of her toes and is in no hurry.

I want that. I want that stare on her face that says she is somewhere else focusing on her goal. I don't have that anywhere in my life. I can't think of a single thing that I leisurely work into to then stay focused on like that. With work, it's one deadline after another, school is the same. Although I enjoy both, there is an end product that is necessary. This woman might jog b/c she has to or maybe b/c she wants to but she is dedicated to it. If I exercise or take any time for myself, it's rushed as I have an eye on the clock. I wonder if I'll ever have that stare, that unhurried grace as I do something for myself. Hmmmm.

Tuesday, November 7, 2006

Beginning in Sight

I have had to learn the hard way not to stress about events I can not control. One such large event is The Man's job hunt (no job equals staying in the military which equals less family time together). I can search for jobs, even apply him for them but I can go no further. This has led to panic at times b/c I'm a huge control freak. Huge! Did I mention that I like to control things? Yeah, I do. Over the years, I've worked to practice a method that every good teacher has taught me, "If you have done what you could, turn it over to God, then stand back and watch his glory!" I can't tell you the number of times I have heard this advice from friends and family. Yet, only a few times have I successfully done this. I got to the point recently where I had to stop stressing and hand God my baggage. Worrying about our family's future has taken it's toll, as work, family and school don't stop. So I loaded it all up and handed it over. The Man and I had a talk about this saturday night and he encouraged me to give it up as we are doing all we can, worry will only undo our potential blessings.

That said, The Man got a call yesterday about an awesome job in a very rural setting (perfect for raising our girls and having a home and land). They are paying to fly him out in this month for a system test. Today brought more good news, a big company he has previously had four interviews with (this place makes you speak to EVERYONE) emailed him flight and rental car information for a trip next month for a final interview. So, in three days we have went from a sluggish, slow job hunt (results wise) to full blown business folks. The Lord provides! It's all yours God!

Sunday, November 5, 2006

The Hunt Is On

The Man came back and took us all out for a night of seafood and shopping. I love this man. Does he know his girls or what? Duchess bypassed fries in favor of broccoli with her shrimp last night! The waiter was like, huh? Not to mention, she was Snow White last night, for her "date" with dad. I'm surprised they didn't ask me to sit at another table.

Started my day off doing laundry, which led to dishes, which led to cleaning out my fridge. It's been a year since I did this...OMG. Does anyone regularly think to clean their fridge? Or am I just that bad at housework?

We decided to skip out on the trip out of town, we'll wait and if he is offered the job then we'll go see the place. Spent all of last night online job hunting together. For myself, a job has always come easy, I'm administrative office help. For The Man, job hunting is turning out to be a full time job, dear Lord. Say a prayer, we're working it!

The girls made muffins the other night for Princess' class. This went great until we put them in the oven and left the kitchen to do nails. The first clue of trouble was the black smoke (amazingly the alarm did not go off). Turns out the whole pan of muffins were on fire, in the oven. WTF? So yeah we dumped the whole shabang. But here are the cutest pics of my chefs.

Friday, November 3, 2006

Oh yeah, John Kerry

A message from our friends overseas, protecting our freedom: (besides YOU SUCK)

The Man is in town...

I can tell that The Man is in the city limits. My instinct to bathe and dress the girls, clean my house to an inch of it's life has set in, and do the ummm "upkeep" every girl should do when the man is enroute home, yep, I gotta shave my legs. So, he's back, although he's on duty so he can't come home till in the morning.

Well the Queens in training finally cleaned their rooms today. We all pitched in and helped. Duchess truly has royal tendencies, she hoards treasure. Under her bathroom sink was a half full box of grape juice packs. Guess she needs her own stash. Other items of interest found: three toothbrushes, half a bagel (can't remember the last time we had bagels), four of her sisters cds and about half my jewelry. Yep, she has been busy. Today when I picked her up from school she announced that she was tired of school and just wanted to work with me from now on. :) Think the boss will buy that one?

My house is on the market. I dream about this house. The perfect beautiful house complete with palm trees (no clue how they keep them so nice here). According the to flyer out front (house costs so much, the free flyers are in color and on glossy paper) it has five bedrooms and three bathrooms, a sunroom and an artist acove in back that gets amazing light. Yep, this is the house for me. Slightly out of our price range but I do love this house. Mom, if you're reading this, hurry up and win the lotto! This baby won't last long.

Tomorrow after Princess attends a roller skate party, we are all heading out for an overnight jaunt to a town about 3 hours away in the middle of nowhere. The Man had an interview about a job there and it went well, so we're suppose to scout the area. Dear Lord, did I mention that it is the middle of NOWHERE? Yes, according to the research I've done on the area, there is NO shopping other than Walmart (don't get me wrong, I can do a Walmart but where is the mall?) and it's called the outdoors paradise of the area. NOT me. The Man is so excited, however the girls have announced that they refuse to sleep in a tent. We were assured that there was a hotel for our overnight trip but I'm not betting on it. I DO NOT do tents. This doesn't look good for us girlie girls!

On a more serious note, I received word from an old boss that her son, currently deployed in Iraq, was injured badly last night. Asking prayers! His status is alive but nothing else is known.

Thursday, November 2, 2006

Chicken, oh Chicken

I had Chick-fil-A for dinner. This is my favorite of all times food. I crave this like most people get chocolate. Yep, will go straight to my butt however, it was worth every finger licking part. I did myself proud, I didn't even snag pieces off the kids plate! Woohoo! The Man comes home in two days and I'm ready. Except I have to clean the house, do the laundry, clean the tubs, wash the bird stuff off his truck and vacuum. Yep, I've not done much house work while he was gone. lol

Well I'm working on Princess' birthday party. We have decided to do a supergirl theme. We're holding it at a bowling alley/party place. So we have two lanes reserved for 15 girls and we'll then move into the party area where we'll have cake and snacks. The Man and I are gonna hold a "Fear Factor" style food competition with prizes and then turn them over to their parents. Hoping that this will turn out as well as it does in my head. Still working on a party for the Duchess, probably gonna have hers at home. Being a cool mom is tough work. Speaking of work, made it all day without falling asleep once. I even managed to look super busy walking around holding papers. My english class starts next week so I'm sure I'll have plenty of work to fill my workday. The man had his interview today, one down, three to go. Go Man!

Wednesday, November 1, 2006

Halloween, Gas and More

The Princess got into the car after school today with grave news, she farted in front of her class. I immediately had to bite my tongue but the Duchess laughed till she couldn't breath. I tried deep breathing but was still struggling to hold my laughter in (yep, bad mom) when she then announced in a voice filled with tears that when everyone started laughing and she was stomping back to her desk, she did it again. I burst. What kind of parent responds to her crying child by laughing? Me. I suck. To cover my tracks, I immediately lied and said that it had happened to me too. I then had to further lie by giving a story when she hopefully asked all about it. She assured me that she was embarrassed but that she didn't cry. I'm so proud. My amazing kid then told everyone who was laughing that gas is very nature and that if they didn't fart too then they would explode. Science is definately in her future! The teacher tried to calm things down but she will forever be known as the kid that farted in front of her class, but she didn't cry. I love this kid.

Halloween was great. We ate and ran. I brought along the trusty red wagon filled with coats and a blanket to warm everyone up as we went but they left me in the dust. Fifteen minutes into it, the novelty wore off and Duchess was covered up to the top of her tiara with a blanket. She was just hollar for her sister to bring her back a treat. It was very cold here, unusual for this time of year so after four streets we hauled our loot back home. Just to have the doorbell ring a million times. I am the lady that forgot to buy candy. So we ignored it, and ignored it and ignored it. Finally it stopped. The Man returns Saturday and the girls have upgraded him from Denny's to Red Lobster, in their costumes. He is one lucky man.

Work is great, I love having a job where I have alot of freedom to do my own thing (like homework and email my girlfriends) but I have got to find some extra stuff to do. The boss went offsite all afternoon (I think he went shopping) and I woke up around 2 with the imprint of my mousepad on my forehead, in an office of fifty something cubicles you would think someone would notice the drooling and snoring (I've been told that I occassionally snore) but no, no one noticed. I think that is a good thing. I need more productive hobbies, maybe I should start a home business to run out of my cubicle?