Southern girl plowing her way through life making the rules up as she goes. Warning: likes to bake, curse, quote movies/literature, is tattooed, married to The Man and mother of two girls. We bring new meaning to the "griswald way of life". Come along for the ride!

Life is My Highway

Montana and North Dakota have become home.... dang it lol.

These Girls

Lord help me but these babies wear me out.... they are just perfect!


Yes, it's from last winter but I adore this us....


This kid glows from the inside out... my almost 11 year old!

We are so smexy!

Favorite sport: embarrassing our kids in public


My mini-me is finding her own way in life

Thursday, August 30, 2012

I survived a four mile hike

So this past weekend my sweet husband decided to take the entire family hiking. It seems only right since our new town has an amazing range of mountains that start at the very edge of town. Literally three miles from my front door! So we decided to make our grocery run to the wally world two hours away and then head into the mountains for a family hike. There are three dedicated, mapped out hike trails so we were aiming for one that day.

Except, we got to wally world and my husband digressed into his military training. I managed to shop for a new kitchen aid mixer and all groceries while he was stuck in the sporting goods section. He cracks me up.

I wasn't laughing though when I got home and he started seperating his "stuff" from the house stuff. I paused. Cause my man was digging out backpacks, yes we each got individual light weight hiking packs. He filled each pack: 6 water bottles, toliet paper, wet wipes (OMG), granola, protein bars, and a knife..... finishing it off with a walkie talkie radio. He set aside the tent and stove cause we are obviously not ready for those.......

We got there and had a great first hike. We went for a mile on a great canyon hike that was fun yet a little challenging at some spots. We drank our waters and pointed out sink holes, fox holes, and lots of cool rock formations. It was sooooo purty up there.

Until we got cocky and decided to finish that one and go for another one. Except the next one was an insane 3 mile hike that started at the top and went down into a deep, sharp canyon. It was a wild climb down and frankly when we got to the bottom and realized that we had to turn around and go right back the way we came to get out. We weren't laughing about the toliet paper by that point.... and I'm proud to say it wasn't me who peed on her shoe this time!!!! GO me!!!!!!!!

All in all, by the time we got back to my truck, we literally passed out with wobbly legs and thankful prayers that the Lord dragged our butts back up the mountain before said legs gave out! We are very very blessed.

We are all together.

We are seeing parts of the US that others won't ever see.

My kids are experiencing so many new things, learning to adapt through any situation and location.

We are all together, all the time!

God is good.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

First Day of School

So here I sit. It's quiet, and I'm frankly thinking of a nap. It's tiring being the person in charge of takign care of the rest of these peeps. This morning was adorable. I woke up at 0629 with Prin standing over like, so I yelped and then turned my head to see Duchess standing there too. Turns out that Dave is brilliant. The old fashioned alarm clock that we bought for the kids and set so they can get themselves up? Well that mutha works like a BOSS! These peeps were all up in the grill this morning waiting on me to get off my butt and make breakfast. Cause that is what I do, ya'll.....  I spoil my family.

So I drug my sleepy butt out of bed and crawled in the kitchen to throw some cinnamon rolls into the oven. Then I brushed my teeth cause I'm considerate like that.... before I start drill instructor yelling to get the troops in line.

Except my kids are pros at this by now... seriously... new school: got this.

Their bags were packed with properly labeled school supplies, required pre-purchased gym uniforms and gym bags, and chapstick cause we do love some chapstick up in here. So while they scarfed breakfast adn talking about inappropriate gas in embarrassing school situations with their dad, I packed their lunch.

I have a thing about their lunch.

I can admit.

I'm an OCD freak where their food is concerned. SO much so that I have hounded the school district until they released the school menus yesterday. I then drove and got them, cause hello, I need to know what they plan on feeding my children so I can decide whether to send lunch or not. So after briefly glancing at the menu, I issue the cafeteria a check that should feed my kids till Christmas cause they'll only eat there maybe once a week. Yo. They are charging $2.50 a lunch for meals that only contain meat three times a week. Seriously, tator tot casserole don't really do it for me as a main course.

So I sat down and the kids circled the few meals they'd be interested in eatting at school and then we made a menu for the rest of the month.

Last night, I made them chickfila style baked chicken nuggets, small side of baked mac/cheese, fruit kabobs and a boiled egg. Slap some milk in there and a banana, peanut butter muffin for snack and you're done. Happy kids taking good food rather than eat meatless nachos for the first day of school.  I also had left overs enough to send Dave the exact same lunch although not sure how much will be saved for lunch cause I saw him pealing a muffin wrapper off while driving off.

So he went with me this morning, marking one of the very first times that Dave has taken the kids to their first day of school. (Just another reason why we have moved into the middle of absolutely nowhere .... so we can be together as a family every single day!)

Princess let me drive her and a new friend to 8th grade... we literallyt jumped out of the truck, took pics and then she kissed my cheek and took off to 8th grade. At least she let me get that far.... although it helped that Dave was pulling me back into the truck the whole time too, lol. I love my peeps. So there was my Duchess..... the one who still wants us. Bouncing in the backseat, so excited that mommy and daddy was both taking her to her first day of school in Montana.

See last week, when I registered her... I also had the secretary give me a school tour so I knew where her classroom was and where the bathroom was, cafeteria and etc. I quizzed Duch so I knew she wouldn't get lost. The building is old old old, built in like 1882 and has high ceilings, huge, tall narrow doors, and it's a three story building with half stories built around the gym. So there's alot of nooks and crannies. So we jumped out with her, walked her in and slipped past the duty teacher so she could show daddy her room and then it was time to lead her out onto the packed playground. She was tightly holding our hands, assuring us that it was okay that we were staying with her, cause other parents were there. Then the principal introduced himself, showed us the teacher, introduced Duch to the teacher and she dismissed us.

This is what life has come to......

My kids dismiss me.

Now it's time for my nap.....

Cause I need to get up and start dinner..... Apparently my day revolves around food now. And the gym.

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Making school lunches....

School starts tomorrow.... Wow.... So tip: to keep sliced fruit fresh, cut it then soak overnite in tang.... Drain and pack in lunchboxes in morning. Stays pretty and fresh!

Monday, August 20, 2012

The hair....

I did mention that I got rid of the black yes?

Sunday, August 12, 2012

Damn U Muffin Top, U Suck

So this was an actual conversation in my house today.........seriously.......

Me, while getting dressed for a church dinner yakking with Dave about a trip next weekend for the sheer purpose of shopping: Soooooo, do you think I should "embrace my fatness" and ......

Him: did you just say "embrace my fatness".... like give it a hug? I'm lost....

Me: Don't interrupt... now seriously should I embrace the fatness and buy jeans that fit since I gained 14 effffing lbs (don't judge that I curse on the way to a church deal) or should I just starve out the fat and continue to wear the snug fitting jeans (when we all know I like my jeans loose and baggy)?

Him: wait, go back to embrace the fatness.....

Me: shut it, what you think? Should I let my muffin top just reach out and slap my hand everytime I reach for something to eat rather than grab my keys and go buy a pack of smokes?

Him: muffin top slap what? (I have to point out that he was laughing hysterically at me at this point and I lost interest in the conversation since he was no help).....

But seriously, I hate hate hate tight jeans. I can not stand them, cause i have a stomach disease and the two do not go well together when I have a flareup. So by habit, I wear jeans that are too big. Except now that I can gained weight (EFFFFFFFF ME) they are tight adn some are too tight.

Like the pair of Big Star jeans that I ADORE..... like seriously, I can't believe I paid that much for them but I adore them and Dave adores me so he bought them before I could have a panic attack over spending that money on somethign that covers my ass. Judge me for that, go for it :)

So those jeans, yeah too tight. Like borderline camel toe..........which a classy southern girl like me? NOT GONNA HAPPEN EVER. So I gave them to Princess.

Yeah, you heard that fair.... I gave that beautiful amazing pair of jeans to Princess..... and they fit perfect for a 13 year old. Fit well but not TOO well...... dayum it. I'm never getting those jeans back but that was a deciding factor in my passing up dessert tonight at the social, especially since I made peach cobbler from scratch for that thing.

Lord, have mercy........

I have that damn muffin top wiht a effffffffffing passion!

It has to die.........

Oh and things are good. Just counting down the days till kids start school. We are staying busy getting all their paperwork in order and their lists made.... and riding bikes and so far I'm down 3 lbs.... but my face is still freaking chubby.....


Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Cheap and Easy

Well I'm all better.

Apparently, when I'm so pissed I could shave you bald and set you on fire... I can be appeased with a genuine apology and a big ass strawberry shake.

I'm a cheap and easy $%#@.

But things are great today. I am on a roll yo.... if I wasn't Baptist, I'd buy a lotto ticket!

So I gots the kids enrolled in school today. They start in two weeks. Can you hear my internal happy squeal? Cause it's loud and raunchy! And it has pompoms and a little skirt! Don't get me wrong, I adore my kids and frankly my kids could kick the hell out of your kids in a heartbeat, but it's been a long long time since I've spent an ENTIRE summer at their beck and call. OMG, it's a wonder I'm not a drunk.... it's enough that I've quit smoking and become a fat ass!

So I have plans man........ cause before they can start school... you need school shopping.

And when you live in the absolute boonies (wait..... I need to address this please before we go any further.....

See when we lived in Texas.... we "lived in the boonies" cause we lived outside of town and after years of living on military bases and in super megacities well, frankly it was the boonies..... then we moved to Idaho.... we were 45 minutes from wal-mart people.... I lived in a log cabin on the side of a freaking mountain....... yeah, brings a new meaning to in the boonies... but then they transferred us to Montana ((and Dave's boss just loves living in my log cabin, sigh.....)) and we are currently an hour and a half from a wal-mart.... repeat, we are an hour and a half from a wal-mart. We are bringing new meaning to middle of freaking nowhere people.... seriously..... the town here is old, and bringing new meaning to little, old town and we are out here miles and hours from anything..... eastern Montana is the absolute boonies....

Just had to clear that up)... continuing: you have to make the most of any reason to travel to Big Town. And when we talk about Big Town we are discussing any town that has a real life freaking ass MALL.

Yeah, we're going shopping soon... to Big Town!

OMG, it's such a trip that we'll need a hotel room.

That's awesome enough that I'm gonna repeat....... we need a hotel room. We gonna have a weekend of shopping.

I'm quivering I'm so excited!

Yep, I'm cheap and easy.

Lucky Dave!

Monday, August 6, 2012

Piss Me Off

It's all fun and games until you piss me off. It's really best not to piss me off and act like you are in chrage of me.

Friday, August 3, 2012

What We B Doing

Life is starting to settle down in a lovely manner. We are finally unpacked into the tiny little house. We are just organizing and playing with spaces now, and waiting on the medevil downstairs bathroom to be renovated next month. ;) Yeah baby...

School starts in three weeks and the kids are super excited. We have planned a weekend getaway to a big city that actually has a "effffffing mall baby". I can smell the shoes from here, cause Princess has gotten the shoe bug. You mention shoes and she starts to quiver like Murphy when he sees you grab his leash. Oh lord, that girl loves shoes. Except unlike my former addiction to high heels, she likes flats and boatshoes. Oh and converse, if she could have forty different colors of converse in her size, she'd be complete. Duchess still prefers boots, with EVERYTHING, and EVERY OUTFIT.

Both kids survived tennis camp with Princess picking up some skillz and Duchess managing not to knock another kid unconscious with her racket. Swimming lessons are over as well. We've moved on to Duchess playing soccer.

Dave, the man I crave, is currently in Denver for a conference. Bless his heart, he seems to be missing us. It's the first time since we moved here that he's been apart from us. I really hope he doesn't forget my list of "needs" from Bath and Body Works... cause there is one next to his hotel. Yeah baby. ;) Priorities!

Tomorrow is a rodeo in a nearby town, and you can bet that us girls will be throwing on our boots for a good time. Montana does love their rodeos! I'll be sure to take more pics.

And as soon as I find the damn cord, I'll add more pics of the usual around here. HUGS! More to come....

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Key word: GYM

I'm spending a lot of time in the gym now. I'm serious about dropping my "non-smoking" weight... yeah still smoke free cause I'm a beast like that yo!

And it has NOTHING to do with the fact that I'm going through a huge, heavy cooking phase. I'm busting out all kinds of crazy stuff: king ranch casserole, homemade rolls, chocolate pursian rolls, open faced creole omelets, and don't get me started on the fresh veggies I'm putting to use since I refuse to pay $2 a can for a tiny serving of canned veggies.

So yeah, I have a goal... lose the 14 lbs I gained and another few to get me to my target weight of 124. Then maintain.

So I'm alternating, one day just running/biking or walking two miles and one day of full workout provided by Dave. :) It is NOT an easy workout. In fact, he came along the other night to make sure I was doing the exercises properly and when he caught me cheating on my situps, he got involved and drill sargent-ed my ass.... I seriously think I wet myself doing 15 real situps. I'm an out of shape fat ass. Lord help me, I'm so lucky that I amuse him.

I'm so damn sore it's not even funny. Here's to achieving my goals though, I'm ready to drop this weight and smoking is not an option even though I miss it so effffffffing much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!