Facing My Fears

Today I did something that I've never ever volunteered to do: I faced a fear. And I made it through, crying, but I made it through.







The one thing that I really truly am, is claustrophobic. I hate small spaces. I am fine in elevators, I'm fine in walkout closets as long as the door is open. I'm even dealing with the tiny rv bathroom (door open, sorry if that is TMI but tough).







Today was my very own personal hell.







During our walk this afternoon with Murphy, we realized that he was not making PE possible so we came to put him back inside when it happened.







The bottom lock, the deadbolt on our rv door, the tumbler went out. We were stuck. Long story short, couldn't reach Dave, locksmith quote was way too expensive and would have taken too long to get here.







So I went to a local rv place, bought a new lock, then dug out the mallet, the drill/screwdriver, the long screwdriver and cooking oil....determined to replace the lock once and for all.







Princess went through the window we pried open above the sink (thank god they give us each a big ole picnic table) and then gathered up my purse and cell which allowed us to call said locksmith and to purchase the new lock. But then she went in again (brave amazing kid) to help me. I couldn't ever possibily fit through that window. But thanks to the recent 30 lbs I've lost, I was able to go through the bedroom window after she opened it.



My problem was not going through the window.



It was not the process that followed:





I got the old faceplate off the old lock. Gagging at the dirt and nasty gunk underneath.

Finally I saw daylight......

This was the worst part, getting the deadbolt out required that I coat it all with cooking oil spray, then mallet the thing as far out as I could without destroying the frame.....then....then...oh lord

I had to climb back out the window and pry it loose from the outside. But I had to go out the window.........I had a panic attack. I cried. But my 11 year old refused to give me privacy for my little attack. She stood outside that window on that picnic table and looking through coached me....

"momma, you're doing so good, don't cry........you can do this...." My kid talked me off the ledge, or in this case out the tiny arse window from where I was locked inside this rv. Me not do so good with the locked in part.

But I finally got the old piece out! Thank you LORD! With alot of biting back curse words and brute force (which I didn't realize I had), but motivation comes in many forms....me being stuck inside locked rv was a large large motivation!

Ohhhh daylight.......this is where the brute force, cooking oil spray and mallet came in handy.

But I did eventually get the new piece in place on the inside......

And the outside piece was put in via flashlight as the sun set on us.......thanks Princess for holding it still.

And the window that my happy arse went through.......well above you see Princess working the screen back into place. Did I mention I don't do well with tight spaces?

Thanks to Duchess for hanging out with Murphy in the ac-ed car with the music blaring, and to Princess for being my hero and helping mommy be brave. And to Mr. Abbie for selling me a new lock which was dirt cheap....and to the lock company for not putting any directions in the box with said new lock....and to my camera for letting me document each screw that came out and where it was suppose to go which allowed me to actually put the damn lock thingy back in place.

I still can't believe I made it back out that damn window.

But as of today, I can proudly say....although I'm not mechanically inclined what so ever, I managed to fix my own problem!!!

Posted in: On The Road,Wordless