Southern girl plowing her way through life making the rules up as she goes. Warning: likes to bake, curse, quote movies/literature, is tattooed, married to The Man and mother of two girls. We bring new meaning to the "griswald way of life". Come along for the ride!



Monday, March 22, 2010

A Tale for All Parents

So we left Texas in the late evening, intent on driving straight through to Oklahoma to visit my inlaws and our favorite lake. So we did just that. Murphy napped, the kids watched tv and I read by flashlight (don't hate on me, I have to read when I can) and Dave drove. It was quite uneventful until we hit Muskogee, Ok.

Then I had to call up my bank and make sure I had enough cash on hand to bail out my husband.

Cause I was just sure that he was gonna:

A. Kill someone with his bare hands

or

B. Shoot them point blank between the eyes with his gun that is always in his waistband

And frankly I was all for either.

See we hit up a truckstop in the wee wee hours of the morning, before the sun was up...when bakers are just yawning over that first batch of donuts.

Princess needed to pee and Dave jumped out to take her in. The place was sparse. So in they go into their respective bathrooms. Upon exiting, Princess was waiting on Dave. This never happens, he always beats up "seaters" out. So on the way to the truck, out the front door they come and he asks her why. She says she'll tell him in the truck.

Stop. They stop in the parking lot. And I watch from the truck as he goes from sweet concerned dad to super pissed off short tempered cowboy I married in zero to nothing flat.

Oh boy, here we go. I release my seatbelt and go to open the door. Intent on heading off whatever storm is coming, cause that is my job as wife.

But Princess comes running over as he goes storming back in the store and tells me:

A guy came in the womens bathroom while she was in there and went into the stall next to her.

She hurried up and left without washing her hands, sorry mom.

I climbed back into the truck with my kids and sat.

Waiting on the flashing lights, I would put up bail in a heartbeat.

However, the wait was killing me and so I locked the kids in and popped my head into the store cautiously to see what the holdup on killing someone was. Seriously, we had to get to the lake. Kill him and move on.

But as I stuck my head in, Dave looks back and nods to the truck. So I went back. To wait and watch through the windows.

Finally Dave comes out and finishes talking with one of the store clerks. Nods then gets into the truck. No lights, no police, no gunshots, no anything.

Huh?

He gets onto the highway before he speaks. He went in, stood guard outside the bathroom but noone came out. So he grabbed one of the pimply clerks and tells him that a man went into the womens bathroom. Kid actually laughed and said it wouldn't surprise him. Till he gets a good look at Dave's face and when Dave told him that his eleven year old daughter was in there, then things changed. The clerks went and checked the security cameras.

Turns out, my kid was right.

Kinda

I very very manish looking trucker with a deep heavy voice did go into the womens bathroom.

SHE did look like a man, talk like a man but well............she wasn't a man.

Just a burly old trucker lady.

So now bloodshed.

But was so proud of how my kid handled it!

And pleased to get back on the road. Glad that Dave's first arrest wasn't in front of our kids. lol