WTF?

Princess is chilling on the couch with Murphy watching tv with me.... and casually mentions: "I'd really like a set of throwing knives for Christmas" ....

Excuse me?

Hell to the Effffffffffffing NO

WTH?

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We Tore It Up

So I'm baaaaaaaaaaaack.

I love my husband. He rocks my world yo..... for sixteen (?) years, he's just cool as hell. And spoils me, and I totally don't deserve it. But who am I to correct his ways?

So he had his yearly budget stuff going on last week, and wouldn't you know it was in Idaho where we were previously living (remember my beautiful log cabin on the side of a mountain, yeah me too). So knowing that my Connie Poo and I were so sad since we hadn't needed bail money together in months, he offered to take us along.

Wait, you will take me back to Idaho.... and stay in that cute little bed and breakfast with the ginormous tub and the hot pools and the Connie and her kids (convientantly bffs with my kids)?

No brainer peeps.

I took about 30 soaks in that tub. Weird, turns out that Montana is very very dry. Like scaley peeling nasty ashy shitty skin dry. I'm narly looking. But Dave has determined that since I don't drink water, I must suck it in through my skin..... my skin is so freaking perfect after the hot pool soaks. But we're back now so I'll be ashy and gross in 3-2-1.....

Connie Poo and I laughed so hard that my stomach hurt bad. I wet myself once and had multiple close calls. I took over her kitchen and cooked for both families. Her teenaged son who I've rarely seen outside of his room, suddenly became my new best friend.... I think it was my chocolate chunk cookies.

We went on a double date with our husbands who are strangly very similar! They saw a boy movie and we saw Pitch Perfect, fun shit! Fat Amy cracks my chubby ass up!

I colored her hair. It didn't go well. In my defense, she picked the box color out and I just did the rinse. Wait, is it my fault if I was just the slave labor? I don't think so..... I need to discuss this with her and her extremely pinkish hair.

We got our pedis on. I have frankensteins on my big toes. Cute as hell. Shit, sorry... my inner girl was showing.

So in Idaho we also picked up some parts for Dave's latest project. We are building our own A R-1 5s.(sorry but by spreading out the name, maybe it won't pull in a keyword search) Four of them to be specific. One for each of the family, just because ....well you never know when you will need those in your arsenol. Right? Plus, can I point out that we move often with his work and there is only one small part of a build kit that is registered.... cause I'm of the opinion that one day, those registery lists will be used for something I won't like! Just sayin.....

The kids got to get some awesome shopping in... they were adorable with their allowance. Each gets a monthly allowance and I just have to point out that Dave is a freaking genius. Other than must haves and a few (very few) wants, they have to buy their own stuff. Those awesome boots that she just has to have..... out of her allowance.... those earrings that she must have.... ditto.... that toy....ditto ditto..... brilliant. In the two months since he started it, both kids have shown a new tendency to step back from the really expensive stuff if they don't really need it. Prin passed up a A&F hoodie because it was more than one month of her allowance. She is learning to disclipline herself. Did I mention that my Dave is the man?  I'm just a little nervous he's gonna give me an allowance!

Oh and the 14 plus hour truck ride for this little trip? For the record... let me just say that my man has the patience of Job. If he wasn't taking us, he'd have taken a quick little plane ride and boom been there with a rental car and a nice hotel room. Instead, he got to drive my truck (I love my truck) packed with girls, girl stuff and the Murphy man who we had to drop off at doggie spa in the nearest big city.... little turd was spoilt rotten. Back to Dave, not only did he do all the driving (except the 20 minutes through Bozeman when he was napping and I took a shortcut that wound up taking us straight through west yellowstone and the damn 55 mph speed limit, urgh .... he was not amused, although he admitted it was really purty!), he also listened to all our music until he found a Randy travis gospel cd at a truck stop and played it NONSTOP... thank goodness for earplugs and my ipod... poor kids ...... He stopped everytime someone was snacky or had to pee and he did all this without a single complaint. Turns out he might really enjoy having us around all the time. huh.....

He even smiled when the CEO of his company (from Canada yo) got to meet me in my pjs.... long story short... I was just up from a nap in a sweatshirt and tights when he calls to say he was almost outside... early for the day.... yeah, the CEO was nice enough to drop him off..... at the door .... where I stood in my pjs.... he came and met me. I was so flustered. Dave got mega points for looking real proud to introduce me. Bless his heart, I'm his burden. (anybody ready to give him a medal yet?)

So now we are here, back in our little Montana town. Unpacked late last night, fell into bed with a very happy to be home Murphy man. This morning, kids went to school... Dave went to work... and then boom.... I started laundry. By noon, I'd managed to do eight small loads (dang small washer/dryer.... I miss mine but they are in storage) and I'd managed to sort all the stuff and put away. Even managed to strip bed and put on fresh bedding WHILE catching up on my shows I missed. Hello, Major Crimes and Project Runway! However, by noon.... I was at the end of my rope. Prin walks home for lunch sometimes and today when she came home.... there was nothing quick to eat so that meant that I needed to hit the grocery store for lunch stuff AND finish another eight loads of laundry. I cheated. I haven't used a laundrymat since we were E4s but I did so today yo! I rocked that dang laundrymat and got everything done in 1.14 hours. Bedding? check. Bleached my whites? check. Got all Dave's fancy dress shirts hung up and purty (never thought I'd type that shit, I might need to go back to work)....? check. Yeah, well my chores got done in time for the rain to start. Now to just clean the house.

That can wait till tomorrow. I'm going to snuggle up to my dearest husband.

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Lazy asses..

Instead of a hike, we took a four wheeler

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Having a ball....

I heart Idaho!!!!! Be back soon.

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Roundtrip 74321

Tomorrow bright and early.... I'm packing up some yummy baked goods, some kids, a dog heading for doggie spa, a diesel driving daddy and we heading out.  Going to visit my bff...... and Dave has work. Here we go.....

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Volleyball all done

Princess had her final vb game yesterday. They won... kicking some butt. Prin did great.  Sidenote: the workouts for vb..... she's lost 12 lbs. Dang, sign me up

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In business babee

Got off my lazy ass and put blogger on my phone. Its pics galore yo.  Here's a brief overview of my week for ya..... snow. Soccer. Braces. Football. And more.... I'm back babee.

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Blah

I have literally been doing nothing.

Oh sure, I've done cooking, laundry, thinking about the gym, doing school work, chasing kids around and sleeping.

But otherwise I'm a boring dud....

And it snowed today.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.



PS: I'm ready to go home now please. Scotty, beam me down.....

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Total Slacker!

Wow, I've been really slacking with me blog. Apologies! I have an excellent excuse: I've been napping. No, seriously I've been a little whelmed trying to get kids all settled and etc here in Montana. It's such a tiny little town. It's also a tiny town mentality. However, we are slowly making friends (kids are, we all know I hate people) and getting a schedule.

This past week was hysterically Griswald shit up in this murther:

• Dave is doing his money making, boss man thing
• They tiny house is still tiny as hell
• Dave has decided to build his own AK47 ~ the only way to get around the "I promise to not buy another gun till Father's Day" pinky swear (stinker)
• Princess had her first vollyball game evah. She made the eight grade team yo. It was awesome seeing her bust her butt! Although they lost (which seems to be a town thing, their football team is sooooo bad)
• Duchess started soccer season (a measly 6 weeks long) and during practice it occured to me that she isn't a fan of running at 9 just like she wasn't a fan of running at 4, the last time we tried soccer but this was her idea). She's one of two chicks on the team, and she's the only one who isn't well versed in soccer
• Both kids are carrying strong GPA's at the new school! Yes!
• I subbed all five damn days (I'm cutting back to two days a week!)
• Dave and I both had finals.
• I upped my classes so I will grad with my MBA in May of 2013. Holy smokes.
• We register for our news classes, starting next month.
• I finished my paperwork to volunteer at the shelter and with the probation office
• Dave took me to lunch and then got called into a meeting with a client while I sat outside in his truck for an hour and a half, playing with this truck... resetting all his stations and etc.
• We finished out yearly budget.... set the budget to pay off the last remaining bill before we are debt free (except the house). What a HUGE exciting thing!
• We bought Murphy a doggie - bed since we finally acknowledge that we can NOT share a queen bed with each other and the dog. So we caved. And come bedtime, I pulled it out and slipped it right next to my side of the bed. He promptly curled up and went to sleep, I covered him with his very own blankey and he slept there the entire night. OMGosh, my back is so thankful!
• I've started stripping down pallets to get some projects done.
• I have given up and decided that I'm gonna start painting a few rooms of this place, if we are gonna stay in the tiny house, then I'm gonna make it extra comfy.
• Been reminded that the tiny house is a huge blessing! Met another family from LA: Shreveport, LA actually and they have FOUR boys and two dogs shoved into a two bedroom house so frankly, I'm thrilled with our tiny little house! Everything is relative.

So as busy as we've been, we have a ton of stuff coming up too. A bunch of house organization projects cause hello the tiny house is storage challenged. We have dueling soccer and vollyball action going on. Dave and I are trying to stick with our nightly walks after dinner.... this actually lets us have time to talk about everything under the sun without the ever-present easedropping kids. (tiny house remember)

So I'll be back and with pics too, swear......

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Neutered

So not only have a stopped smoking (efffffffffing bite me)..... but I'm trying to stop cursing. I kinda feel like I'm being neutered.

Booze me now please.

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DoucheBags

"He's a douche Bag"


Ummmm, Princess?

WTF? Yeah, that phrase came out of my sweet 13 year old kid's mouth.... So instead of running my truck into a ditch, I calmly waited till we parked (okay, not calmly but I faked it well) and then did the head spinning around, pea soup spewing thing.

Turns out, she has no clue what it means... she thought it meant bonehead.

Dave is dead meat.

So apparently, she's overheard him say that several times when something or somebody pisses him off. Usually involving traffic issues. His cover is to then say bonehead.

This wouldn't drive me absolutely insane if this wasn't repetative behavior.

I'm having flashbacks to my two year old in the backseat of his Firebird. She is all blonde curls and sweet smiles with her huge tweety bird sunglasses on and her floppy hat as we roll down Interstate 5 in southern Cali. Except, somebody cuts off Dave and he immediate response is to yell "COCK..."

Then he freezes and turns his head to me with the bug eyes.... as our precious two year old in the backseat sweetly finishes it "SUCKER"....

Yeah, true story.

I flipped my shit.

Twice now. Sigh............

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That's Mrs. Cool Teacher To You

So I decided when the kids started back to school that I would stay busy and volunteer at the schools. Then I realized that they need subs and I just happen to have a degree. So it's laughable what I'm making an hour, but I freaking love subbing for the middle school kids. They crack me up. Please Princess and I get to hang out, cause she loves having me there.

Except, now that we are three weeks in and I've worked darn near the whole time... well I've become well known. I can't go anywhere....... without a kid calling me out. I remember that this use to happen to my mom when she taught school, but it's really funny.

Until I'm in my pjs, with no makeup on and my hair is a greasy mess. Then it's all....

MOM, it's the cool teacher I was telling you about....

Little dude, that's Mrs. Cool Teacher to you.

These damn people up here do not raise their babies to be respectful at all. Good grief.

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Got Me A Busy Teen

So we are settling in here in Montana. I've got my kids gently introduced into social life here. Meaning, I signed them up this summer for tennis and swimming camps. They met a few people and then boooooom, we got really freaking busy. Dangit.

So Princess joined the vollyball team. They practice four days a week, two hours a day. Grief! Keep in mind that the nearest team to play is over an hour away, so we will be doing some traveling soon.

So lucky girl has a study hall period this year since she is not a band girl and after four years, she is tired of chorus. This leaves a whole period just for homework and studying. Go girl! Eight grade homework is different here. She still has the math problems to do each night but it's not 50 like before. She has more mature projects. Last night she was scouring the net for a "feel good" news article to summarize and cite. Her response (while sitting there still in her vollyball pads)... "it'd be easier if they would actually report about something happy in the news". Truer words kid.....

After practice last night, she came in and grabbed a plate of dinner from the mircowave to scarf down while working on her schoolwork. She looked so centered and sure of herself. I love this growing kid of mine.

Until she looked up and goes "oh mom, can you put piano on hold right now and sign me up for dance?"

?????????

Seems she talked Dave into letting her juggle vollyball and dance.

You get what you ask for...... I'm convinced that this is just a ploy. I think she is determined to keep an extremely tight schedule from now till she gets her learners permit in June. Cause they can get them here at 14 freaking years old........holy shitballz.

I'm not even gonna mention that she found an old ass F150 that is for sale down the road. She wants that truck like I want a cupcake. Sigh.........

She makes me feel old.

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Efffffffing 90

My truck has a slight problem. Just a tiny little problem.....

I should back up. My truck, well she is a sexy beast. My kids name all our vehicles, it's their thing. Usually it's a cute name that goes with their color: Clifford the big red truck, Blacky the truck, Sage the green car.... but my truck. Well she's Fanny. As in Aunt Fanny, cause she has a huge rear end. And if you don't get it, then you haven't seen the kids movie Robots. Hysterical! But Fanny, she is a deep grey so she's kinda looking like a guy. So I put some really cute stickers on her and dont' even get me started on how funny it is to see Dave drive my chickie truck. But then he had to go and put a grill guard on her so she looks like she has a fumanchu thing going on.

But see, my truck she drives like a freaking dream.

I swear it's because she's paid for. It's gotta be the difference in paying cash for a vehicle rather than financing. This truck was the first vehicle since my high school car that I walked in and paid cash for. It felt freaking awesome!!!! And it drives awesome! There is a huge difference in the way I baby this bad boy knowing that she's paid for too......

But I get sidetracked by my cheapass ways.......

My truck drives so well that I literally fly.

As in, my truck really likes to drive 90.

Now in Texas, my car was very familiar with 90 much to my father's dismay.... but I"m a safe driver yo.

Now imagine my disappointment when we get here and word in the lower US is incorrect as Montana does indeed have a speed limit. SUCK IT. I really really looking forward to the no speed limit thing. Now highway speeds are 75, which means that I drive 84. Cause that is the way I roll. I also am constantly on the look out for a "rabbit" to follow.

But the backroads, like the one that stands between me and the town where the hubs works, the same town where we church? Yeah, it's an hours drive at 65 miles per hour. Because it's oil country in a boom and it's neck to neck 18 wheelers on a two lane highway, they go 65.

I pass alot.

Again, I sidetrack... but the truck... every single time I get caught up in the music or start talking to kids, or counting cows (dude, there are a TON of cows in Montana!) I look down and I'm driving 90. It's like that is her default speed.

So in the interest of safety and not getting a ticket that my father will NEVER let me live down.... it's all about cruise control these days.

My life is so damn boring here. ;)

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Disney or D.C.?

So for the past several years, the hubs and I have noticed a trend. Since my kids' birthdays are both the week of Christmas, they tend to get a crapload of bounty! Seriously, they get alot of stuff. Then we notice that toys get stuffed away, clothes are never worn and etc.... because they just get too much. So we started parying that down to just some with one big nice gift. Cause their stuff tends to get bigger and bigger as they get older. I'm sure that this is not news to you peeps.

Being that we are doing our save, live cheap and make a difference in our life thing: we decided this year we are not doing that. Since the kids get clothes as needed yearround (frankly as wanted to) we decided that they will each get one gift per event. Yeah: cheapskate parents ahead folks.... one bday gift and one christmas gift.

Then for Christmas we will do a service project.... we're not sure what it will be but we'll be looking as we get closer.

So we're taking all the rest of the funds that we'd have spent, splitting that in half and and it's the perfect amount for a December family vacation.

Except, we can't agree on where to go.

Dave votes for Disney cause he's the fun parent. And frankly, a big ole kid, luv his face!

I vote for D.C. because I never got to go and I think it would be way cool for me and the kids to experience it together the first time. Dave has gone but only seen a little. Plus at Christmas, D.C. shouldn't be packed right? (And yeah I pulled the pity me card cause I reminded Dave that when everyone else got to go on the school trip to D.C., I couldn't go.....)

We haven't told the kids the location of the vacation yet, mainly because they will vote Disney and that is all she wrote. Although Duchess wanted Hawaii and Princess wanted a cruise. All I can say to that is wow.... people... wow. We're not quite there yet.... still got another year of Dave Ramsey before we can think like that. Good grief.

So yeah, we're still ironing it all out!

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Dinner for Two

So tonight was unusual....

Princess went over to hang out with a friend until tonight's local football game... (Note: we live so far in the boonies that the vistor team drove 3 hours to come play us, dayum) and Duchess rode her bike to her friends house to go play petshops....

So Dave and I went to dinner just the two of us. Sitting down to chat over burgers and fries.

I haven't laughed so hard in ages.

We talked about everything under the sun: my day, his day, the water bill, the kids' schooling, their friends, the tiny stone house, his job, my boobs (hello weight gain).... it was fun just to have that time together.

Then we met up with our babies at the football game to watch the local heroes get trashed 26-6. Those poor kids are just teeny tiny little boys, not so good at the football! Sigh.........

All in all, pretty nice night here in the wilds of Montana.

Weekend full of hiking, cooking, and projects coming up!

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I survived a four mile hike

So this past weekend my sweet husband decided to take the entire family hiking. It seems only right since our new town has an amazing range of mountains that start at the very edge of town. Literally three miles from my front door! So we decided to make our grocery run to the wally world two hours away and then head into the mountains for a family hike. There are three dedicated, mapped out hike trails so we were aiming for one that day.

Except, we got to wally world and my husband digressed into his military training. I managed to shop for a new kitchen aid mixer and all groceries while he was stuck in the sporting goods section. He cracks me up.

I wasn't laughing though when I got home and he started seperating his "stuff" from the house stuff. I paused. Cause my man was digging out backpacks, yes we each got individual light weight hiking packs. He filled each pack: 6 water bottles, toliet paper, wet wipes (OMG), granola, protein bars, and a knife..... finishing it off with a walkie talkie radio. He set aside the tent and stove cause we are obviously not ready for those.......

We got there and had a great first hike. We went for a mile on a great canyon hike that was fun yet a little challenging at some spots. We drank our waters and pointed out sink holes, fox holes, and lots of cool rock formations. It was sooooo purty up there.

Until we got cocky and decided to finish that one and go for another one. Except the next one was an insane 3 mile hike that started at the top and went down into a deep, sharp canyon. It was a wild climb down and frankly when we got to the bottom and realized that we had to turn around and go right back the way we came to get out. We weren't laughing about the toliet paper by that point.... and I'm proud to say it wasn't me who peed on her shoe this time!!!! GO me!!!!!!!!

All in all, by the time we got back to my truck, we literally passed out with wobbly legs and thankful prayers that the Lord dragged our butts back up the mountain before said legs gave out! We are very very blessed.

We are all together.

We are seeing parts of the US that others won't ever see.

My kids are experiencing so many new things, learning to adapt through any situation and location.

We are all together, all the time!

God is good.

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First Day of School

So here I sit. It's quiet, and I'm frankly thinking of a nap. It's tiring being the person in charge of takign care of the rest of these peeps. This morning was adorable. I woke up at 0629 with Prin standing over like, so I yelped and then turned my head to see Duchess standing there too. Turns out that Dave is brilliant. The old fashioned alarm clock that we bought for the kids and set so they can get themselves up? Well that mutha works like a BOSS! These peeps were all up in the grill this morning waiting on me to get off my butt and make breakfast. Cause that is what I do, ya'll.....  I spoil my family.

So I drug my sleepy butt out of bed and crawled in the kitchen to throw some cinnamon rolls into the oven. Then I brushed my teeth cause I'm considerate like that.... before I start drill instructor yelling to get the troops in line.

Except my kids are pros at this by now... seriously... new school: got this.

Their bags were packed with properly labeled school supplies, required pre-purchased gym uniforms and gym bags, and chapstick cause we do love some chapstick up in here. So while they scarfed breakfast adn talking about inappropriate gas in embarrassing school situations with their dad, I packed their lunch.

I have a thing about their lunch.

I can admit.

I'm an OCD freak where their food is concerned. SO much so that I have hounded the school district until they released the school menus yesterday. I then drove and got them, cause hello, I need to know what they plan on feeding my children so I can decide whether to send lunch or not. So after briefly glancing at the menu, I issue the cafeteria a check that should feed my kids till Christmas cause they'll only eat there maybe once a week. Yo. They are charging $2.50 a lunch for meals that only contain meat three times a week. Seriously, tator tot casserole don't really do it for me as a main course.

So I sat down and the kids circled the few meals they'd be interested in eatting at school and then we made a menu for the rest of the month.

Last night, I made them chickfila style baked chicken nuggets, small side of baked mac/cheese, fruit kabobs and a boiled egg. Slap some milk in there and a banana, peanut butter muffin for snack and you're done. Happy kids taking good food rather than eat meatless nachos for the first day of school.  I also had left overs enough to send Dave the exact same lunch although not sure how much will be saved for lunch cause I saw him pealing a muffin wrapper off while driving off.

So he went with me this morning, marking one of the very first times that Dave has taken the kids to their first day of school. (Just another reason why we have moved into the middle of absolutely nowhere .... so we can be together as a family every single day!)

Princess let me drive her and a new friend to 8th grade... we literallyt jumped out of the truck, took pics and then she kissed my cheek and took off to 8th grade. At least she let me get that far.... although it helped that Dave was pulling me back into the truck the whole time too, lol. I love my peeps. So there was my Duchess..... the one who still wants us. Bouncing in the backseat, so excited that mommy and daddy was both taking her to her first day of school in Montana.

See last week, when I registered her... I also had the secretary give me a school tour so I knew where her classroom was and where the bathroom was, cafeteria and etc. I quizzed Duch so I knew she wouldn't get lost. The building is old old old, built in like 1882 and has high ceilings, huge, tall narrow doors, and it's a three story building with half stories built around the gym. So there's alot of nooks and crannies. So we jumped out with her, walked her in and slipped past the duty teacher so she could show daddy her room and then it was time to lead her out onto the packed playground. She was tightly holding our hands, assuring us that it was okay that we were staying with her, cause other parents were there. Then the principal introduced himself, showed us the teacher, introduced Duch to the teacher and she dismissed us.

This is what life has come to......

My kids dismiss me.

Now it's time for my nap.....

Cause I need to get up and start dinner..... Apparently my day revolves around food now. And the gym.

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Making school lunches....

School starts tomorrow.... Wow.... So tip: to keep sliced fruit fresh, cut it then soak overnite in tang.... Drain and pack in lunchboxes in morning. Stays pretty and fresh!

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The hair....

I did mention that I got rid of the black yes?

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Damn U Muffin Top, U Suck

So this was an actual conversation in my house today.........seriously.......

Me, while getting dressed for a church dinner yakking with Dave about a trip next weekend for the sheer purpose of shopping: Soooooo, do you think I should "embrace my fatness" and ......

Him: did you just say "embrace my fatness".... like give it a hug? I'm lost....

Me: Don't interrupt... now seriously should I embrace the fatness and buy jeans that fit since I gained 14 effffing lbs (don't judge that I curse on the way to a church deal) or should I just starve out the fat and continue to wear the snug fitting jeans (when we all know I like my jeans loose and baggy)?

Him: wait, go back to embrace the fatness.....

Me: shut it, what you think? Should I let my muffin top just reach out and slap my hand everytime I reach for something to eat rather than grab my keys and go buy a pack of smokes?

Him: muffin top slap what? (I have to point out that he was laughing hysterically at me at this point and I lost interest in the conversation since he was no help).....

But seriously, I hate hate hate tight jeans. I can not stand them, cause i have a stomach disease and the two do not go well together when I have a flareup. So by habit, I wear jeans that are too big. Except now that I can gained weight (EFFFFFFFF ME) they are tight adn some are too tight.

Like the pair of Big Star jeans that I ADORE..... like seriously, I can't believe I paid that much for them but I adore them and Dave adores me so he bought them before I could have a panic attack over spending that money on somethign that covers my ass. Judge me for that, go for it :)

So those jeans, yeah too tight. Like borderline camel toe..........which a classy southern girl like me? NOT GONNA HAPPEN EVER. So I gave them to Princess.

Yeah, you heard that fair.... I gave that beautiful amazing pair of jeans to Princess..... and they fit perfect for a 13 year old. Fit well but not TOO well...... dayum it. I'm never getting those jeans back but that was a deciding factor in my passing up dessert tonight at the social, especially since I made peach cobbler from scratch for that thing.

Lord, have mercy........

I have that damn muffin top wiht a effffffffffing passion!

It has to die.........

Oh and things are good. Just counting down the days till kids start school. We are staying busy getting all their paperwork in order and their lists made.... and riding bikes and so far I'm down 3 lbs.... but my face is still freaking chubby.....

Crap.

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Cheap and Easy

Well I'm all better.

Apparently, when I'm so pissed I could shave you bald and set you on fire... I can be appeased with a genuine apology and a big ass strawberry shake.

I'm a cheap and easy $%#@.

But things are great today. I am on a roll yo.... if I wasn't Baptist, I'd buy a lotto ticket!

So I gots the kids enrolled in school today. They start in two weeks. Can you hear my internal happy squeal? Cause it's loud and raunchy! And it has pompoms and a little skirt! Don't get me wrong, I adore my kids and frankly my kids could kick the hell out of your kids in a heartbeat, but it's been a long long time since I've spent an ENTIRE summer at their beck and call. OMG, it's a wonder I'm not a drunk.... it's enough that I've quit smoking and become a fat ass!

So I have plans man........ cause before they can start school... you need school shopping.

And when you live in the absolute boonies (wait..... I need to address this please before we go any further.....

See when we lived in Texas.... we "lived in the boonies" cause we lived outside of town and after years of living on military bases and in super megacities well, frankly it was the boonies..... then we moved to Idaho.... we were 45 minutes from wal-mart people.... I lived in a log cabin on the side of a freaking mountain....... yeah, brings a new meaning to in the boonies... but then they transferred us to Montana ((and Dave's boss just loves living in my log cabin, sigh.....)) and we are currently an hour and a half from a wal-mart.... repeat, we are an hour and a half from a wal-mart. We are bringing new meaning to middle of freaking nowhere people.... seriously..... the town here is old, and bringing new meaning to little, old town and we are out here miles and hours from anything..... eastern Montana is the absolute boonies....

Just had to clear that up)... continuing: you have to make the most of any reason to travel to Big Town. And when we talk about Big Town we are discussing any town that has a real life freaking ass MALL.

Yeah, we're going shopping soon... to Big Town!

OMG, it's such a trip that we'll need a hotel room.

That's awesome enough that I'm gonna repeat....... we need a hotel room. We gonna have a weekend of shopping.

I'm quivering I'm so excited!

Yep, I'm cheap and easy.

Lucky Dave!

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Piss Me Off

It's all fun and games until you piss me off. It's really best not to piss me off and act like you are in chrage of me.

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What We B Doing

Life is starting to settle down in a lovely manner. We are finally unpacked into the tiny little house. We are just organizing and playing with spaces now, and waiting on the medevil downstairs bathroom to be renovated next month. ;) Yeah baby...

School starts in three weeks and the kids are super excited. We have planned a weekend getaway to a big city that actually has a "effffffing mall baby". I can smell the shoes from here, cause Princess has gotten the shoe bug. You mention shoes and she starts to quiver like Murphy when he sees you grab his leash. Oh lord, that girl loves shoes. Except unlike my former addiction to high heels, she likes flats and boatshoes. Oh and converse, if she could have forty different colors of converse in her size, she'd be complete. Duchess still prefers boots, with EVERYTHING, and EVERY OUTFIT.

Both kids survived tennis camp with Princess picking up some skillz and Duchess managing not to knock another kid unconscious with her racket. Swimming lessons are over as well. We've moved on to Duchess playing soccer.

Dave, the man I crave, is currently in Denver for a conference. Bless his heart, he seems to be missing us. It's the first time since we moved here that he's been apart from us. I really hope he doesn't forget my list of "needs" from Bath and Body Works... cause there is one next to his hotel. Yeah baby. ;) Priorities!

Tomorrow is a rodeo in a nearby town, and you can bet that us girls will be throwing on our boots for a good time. Montana does love their rodeos! I'll be sure to take more pics.

And as soon as I find the damn cord, I'll add more pics of the usual around here. HUGS! More to come....

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Key word: GYM

I'm spending a lot of time in the gym now. I'm serious about dropping my "non-smoking" weight... yeah still smoke free cause I'm a beast like that yo!

And it has NOTHING to do with the fact that I'm going through a huge, heavy cooking phase. I'm busting out all kinds of crazy stuff: king ranch casserole, homemade rolls, chocolate pursian rolls, open faced creole omelets, and don't get me started on the fresh veggies I'm putting to use since I refuse to pay $2 a can for a tiny serving of canned veggies.

So yeah, I have a goal... lose the 14 lbs I gained and another few to get me to my target weight of 124. Then maintain.

So I'm alternating, one day just running/biking or walking two miles and one day of full workout provided by Dave. :) It is NOT an easy workout. In fact, he came along the other night to make sure I was doing the exercises properly and when he caught me cheating on my situps, he got involved and drill sargent-ed my ass.... I seriously think I wet myself doing 15 real situps. I'm an out of shape fat ass. Lord help me, I'm so lucky that I amuse him.

I'm so damn sore it's not even funny. Here's to achieving my goals though, I'm ready to drop this weight and smoking is not an option even though I miss it so effffffffing much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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