Causing drama and other things....

Got several blessings this week.....big time blessed around here. Which means I'm keeping my dirty potty mouth to a minimum (that copier deserved it).

Buddy passes for 5 round trip airtrips so we can see Dave more............ blessing......

Lead on a travel trailer so that Dave can have his own place to live on the road instead of sharing a 24 foot trailer with 2 other guys........ blessing.........

In other leading news, Duchess lost her first tooth, at 6.5 years old. Snagglepuss is adorable.

Daddy is now watching the kids for the summer. Strangley, I go through my day without thinking about what could go wrong, sweet.

Fun times.

Otherwise I'm just getting back to normal around here, so keep patience with me.

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Inventing Sunday's....

Taste testing recipe tonight:

Mustard-Basil Chicken

and the verdict, OMGawd......I should have made more.

so if you're needing a recipe:

3 tsp dijon mustard
4 tsp olive oil
1 tsp honey
1/2 tsp basil
salt
pepper

mix it up and smear your chicken before you grill.

Easy cheesy chicken pleasey.

Sorry.

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That Just Sucks

Think I've cured myself of my addiction to romance novels. Just hit me that they all have their happily ever afters........where there is no such thing. Each chapter begins, then ends, and another begins.

Time to dig out the murder mysteries.

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Reality Check

So I've reached the point in maturity where I really don't give a shit........about much of anything. If it doesn't revolve around my family or my house......nah......not really caring.

So the response to my trying to post a sign at work that said "I have a headache, please shhhh, shut up" resulted in them leaving me noise cancellation headphones this morning on my desk.

Silence is golden.

I'm one rich b*tch right now peeps.

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Score!

We survived.........almost. We're not completely out of the woods, but today I managed to get back to work (I actually missed my little cubbie/office). Princess seems to finally be on the mend and things are slowly going back to normal......how do I know this?

They are fighting again. Most girls just sass and scream, mine........well mine kick and push. Totally Dave's fault, he's the roughhouser in the household not me.

But thanks to mom/brother who stepped in the first couple of days to assist with one sickly Princess, one jealous and needed Duchess and one sleep deprived living off caffine me. Plus Dave came home early and stayed later to help out. Yeah!!!!

The strange byproduct of this week and one day off work........little sleep and a massive addiction to Mafia Wars. Now, if only my account wasn't under my name instead of my alias.......then I could add all my internet peeps to my mafia......but alias, I'm screwed....level 25 in 8 days of playing, not too shabby for a non-techy girl!

More pics and updates later, gotta go serve up dinner and catch up on laundry. You know that stuff I should have done instead of sitting and playing Mafia Wars with Princess.....there's something to be said for your kid saying at midnight, "mom, let's go rob a pimp".......I swear she has no idea of what a pimp is.......promise.....cross my heart.....

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Countdown to Insanity....

My pre-op baby. She loved the hat and booties. Was great even when they started working on the IV, started freaking when Nurse Hatchet blew a vein, but the amno guy stepped in.

Several hours later, trying to smile for her Mims. Rootbeer popcycle and morphine. Interesting combo.....

This kid came out of amno fighting!! Alligator rolls and all. Gets that aggressiveness from her daddy.

Things pretty rough around here, but Dave is flying in early to give me a hand. I might even shower then, woohoo

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Big Day

Tomorrow Princess goes in for her tonsil surgery. And I'm still awake. She's sleeping.

I have the nervous stomach while she snores......figures.

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Line for the week.....

“it must be humbling to suck on so many levels”
now, to use it at least twice on two unsuspecting people....

this just makes my day!

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Duchess rocks again

Duchess has never been interested in really well anything. She is her own planet, and I just love that about her. No peep pressure for her so far, nope. Beats her own drum, all that jazz. Well during this past week with our obsession over softball (and my aching, well everything) she decided to give it a try. After she beat the ever loving crap out of the tball stand, we gave up and started pitching to her.

N-A-T-U-R-A-L

She started right handed because her mom's an idiot who forgets that she's a lefty. Yep, call CPS now peeps. (pics out of order cause I'm too tired to care)

But she connected, alot.

Then we moved to left handed batting. And starting going into the neighbors yard to get our balls. The kid was having a serious case of beginners luck. Princess was disgusted. It was hysterical.

What was more hysterical was the "look" she wears when playing. I'm still trying to put my finger on who she gets this from, but man she is competitive. Hello! So batting for her equals, "I hate you" looks, followed by "keep talking bigshot and I'll eat your heart" which quickly led to "you stay here, I'm going to get my gun" looks.

It's not everyday you learn something about your kid. Nor is it everyday that she hits facing the wrong direction and cleared the porch of people (jumping off left and right sides like rats from a ship) as she pegged one straight at us, thankfully it hit the side of the house instead of a window.

That freaking rocks. I could use some agression release........where's my bat?

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Dreams

I had the best dream last night.... then I woke up.

Moss was swaying from the trees, the grass on the sides of the road was thick, lush green, the town was old fashioned and a little run down, you could smell honeysuckle in the air. Kids played in yards, and a high school football game was gearing up in heat.

I hate Utah.

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Walking on Faith

It's not easy to blindside me.

Over the years my optimism has been dwindling. I tend to look for the worst possible thing/trait/route at from the start now. I hate that. But I struggle to see my glass as half full.

Got blindsided. My basket is full and I'm worried about dropping an egg or two, or dozen.

I keep thinking that the Lord will show me the path we need to be on, especially since the new year we've had one blow after another. Yet, just when I throw my hands in the air and kick a wall thinking that I've hit my limit........another blow.

July has been a doosey of a month.

Princess is having surgery next Monday. Nothing too big just worried about possible complications with her eardrums (she's having her tonsils removed). The hard part was the quickness with how necessary the surgery was. Poor baby. Good news, I have insurance through my job and this is the first time I've really had to depend on it for something other than a doc visit and I must say, I'm not impressed with it. Damn people, with what this surgery is costing me I'm wondering why I pay premiums at all? Don't get me started on insurance outside of the military, I will explode.

I have no daycare as of yesterday. Things went down beyond my control (which I utterly hate, OCD much?) and I lost my shit. I wish I was kidding, but I was a cooked goose yesterday. Went so far to scream "F*ck This" in the middle of my conservative, LDS workplace. Dear God. Yeah, you read that right, I lost it.

But hitting a brick wall and crumbling has its own rewards. The Lord stepped in not 3 hours after I hit my knees at my desk and just gave it up. Cause I couldn't carry it, couldn't fix it, couldn't think. I live in the freaking boonies. I compute to work.......yet there are very very very few daycare options out here. Women with kids stay home. Period. Yet 3 hours after my little mini-nervous-breakdown the Lord gave me a really really good fix.

The kids will be spending the next three months with the photo elusive retired cop stepdad of mine. Cause honestly, there are few few people I trust with them more than daddy. He'll come over to my house and hang with them so they can play outside and etc. It never occurred to me until I looked at his face when he opened the door and gave me a hug. I slept just fine last night.

Dave is testing tomorrow for his certs that will allow him to accept a perm position with that company (he's been contract) which means benefits, more traveling and stability for him. He's worked his butt off and he's doing so well.

Wish I could say the same.

Feeling like a spectator in my own life right now.

But my glass is half full.........

And I am on level 7 of Mafia Wars, which kicks arse considering I just started "killing" last night. Not bad..........not bad.

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Ponderings

I'm lost.



Feeling like the rut I'm stuck in has 14 foot walls.



Need a step-ladder. Need something.



I've always had a plan.



I ain't got a plan this time.

Damn it that really disappoints me.

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Pooped

I'm done.

Sore from a three day weekend of playing ball, cooking, eating and dealing with Princess' upcoming surgery. Bye bye tonsils!

Yet not ready to get back to the grind....

I'm so ready to retire. Why can't I retire when I'm young so I can get caught up on everything? Have some fun in the sun without body wrinkles and old lady face?

Today I sat down and tried to carve out time for a daily devotional and exercise.

Which is why I ate three pieces of strawberry shortcake! No control!

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Come 2 Momma!

Thank you Pioneer Woman, while browsing through your extensive recipe list, I came across one that I needed. Oh I needed it like RIGHT NOW.

But I tweaked it some. I made homemade gluten free bread first. Then I sauteed some mushrooms and onions in some yummy yummy low fat butter (snicker). Then added some bacon. And some spinach.......

Then I put twice as many tomatoes........oh yeah.

Then smothered it all in the homemade sauce. And sat outside the oven watching patiently. The smell, oh my gawd, the smell.

The final product is .............. okay there are no words.

So now I'm off to eat this with some ribs (thanks photo elusive step dad), corn on the cob, baked beans, sausage, potato salad, and sweet tea.

Dessert is gluten-free strawberry shortcake..........move over Emil!

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In Passing....with Duchess

This kid cracks me up........

I passed her in the hall this morning as I was stumbling myself back to the shower and she was tugging on a light pink "Earth day" shirt while already wearing a pink, orange and red striped skirt.

Her response to my "look".....?

"Well I've always had the best taste in clothes. " Snap!

Two hours later, I'm reading the news at the bar and she is digging in the dishwasher for a cup. She lifted the sifter and wants to know what it's for.

Explained that it was for sifting flour.

"Wow, it gets the honey out of the flowers?"

So while I was scratching my head trying to figure that one out, she took off.

Need a new sifter, mine's in the back yard crammed full of flowers by the time I got to her.

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Happy No Work Day

So what did you do with your "gimme" day, you know the "holiday falls on the weekend therefore you get the Friday before off" day.....?

Besides cleaning my entire house (geez, 10 hours later and you can't tell at all), shopping for the holiday party tomorrow, I did the playday thing. Duchess went to play and I got Princess' best friend (same family peeps, that is totally the way to roll!).

So I took advantage of having two 10 year olds...... see once upon a time I was nuts about softball. Once upon a time, I played a mean second base. Once upon a time, I could windmill your arse!

So when the kids mentioned in passing that they'd like to play one day, I dug up the old equipment and off we went.

(except I was in cleaning clothes so one word about the way I look in my most unflattering outfit and I'm stalking you)

Can you please tell me if that isn't the purtiest background for a game ever? And yes *M* is wearing a skirt. These girls are all about the fashionable look, even to sweat in. Wish they'd rub off on me.

Little hams. Turns out neither one of them were very versed in "ball". So we started at the beginning.......batting stances, proper swing techniques, how to throw a freaking ball.....the usual.

Don't worry, I corrected this immediately! Her stance was waaaaaaaay too wide.

Here Princess is showing her from the outfield how to do it, lol. They totally crack me up.

No words.
Well Princess got the bug. So we had to set up the pitch back cause noone has the patience to throw a ball for several hours straight. (okay, I don't)

Is it me or is this kid seriously growing? Dang, she's so tall!!!!!!!!!! And getting the hang of actually catching the ball and throwing it correctly. Hopefully, maybe, she'll be as obsessed as I once was.

P.S. Does anyone else have a yellow rubber chicken in their yard?

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Oh Crap

I know better. Really I do.

But last night I couldn't sleep, so I watched this and Lord have mercy on my stupid self by the end I was a babbling sobbing mess.

Pity party for one.

Which totally explains the sad, weird dreams.

I needed extra lipstick this morning, to distract from the bags under my eyes.

Tonight I'm watching this.

There is no telling what kind of crazy dreams I'm gonna have tonight.

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And Then I Puked

When Dave came home last time, he made a miracle. And I tried not to cry, but a tear may have escaped.

He made chicken fried steak. Gluten-free chicken fried steak. For me.

Blessings come in many forms, one is breaded and fried.

It's been a full year since I've had anything like it. He just whipped it up and it was wonderful.

So tonight I tried to recreate, with fried chicken.

I ate too much.

Then I puked.

Lord help me, I have no control.

Amen.

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The Never Ending Backyard Saga...

Because there can never be enough in my backyard....we added a patio set today. Turns out the furniture fairy doesn't just drop it off, you actually have to assemble these things.......why oh why didn't I wait till The Man was in town.

Oh because Cec, and My mom/brother dropped in at just the right time. Lucky duckies.


The kids quickly made off with the box.......fort time!

Brother started in asap, with Murphy giving a hand.

Speaking of giving a hand, little Alan is getting quite large and is only 35 weeks along so I gave Cec a hand too.....

Several hands, can't quite keep my hands off the little bugger.

But I can strike an attractive pose...

Notice that everyone else was working while I played, cause I got run off. I put two screws in, striped them both and I was done. I'm not cut for mechanical anything. I'm better at managing/supervising/bossing.

Awwww, almost makes me forget that she's grounded.

But all in all, I must say, I'd have been screwed with the help. They really truly rock!

Hi mom!!!!!!! Love ya!

Frankly I'm thrilled with my new patio set, even though I'll never have enough company over to fill the seats. Only those few who know to drop by rather than plan in advance. Cause I'll find a way out of that.......

Cause I really don't like people, hey, I'm nothing if not honest.

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He Came, He Bought, He Spoiled, He Left

So Dave came home for Father's Day weekend and exercised his daddy privilege and bought the kids a go-kart.

It runs on gas. Lord help me. The day was spent getting it primed and ready to go. I do so love garage sales. They are sweeeeet! Plus you add in a trip to the mall and I'm there.

Please notice the death grip Duchess has on daddy. Not to mention the look on her face. She was all about "speed limits". Poor thing, she must have gotten some of my momma's genes in the driving department (sorry mommy, love you, but you drive SLOOOOOOOOOW). Cause Dave and I have very different driving skills and styles but they are both fast. Princess was totally driving like a pro after the first lap.



Yes, that would be my kids terrorizing the neighborhood, on a Sunday no less. For shame!

Okay, this was the cutest thing, he actually put the thing on ramps while making sure it was kid appropriate. :) Then added some butterfly decals. Cause it's red and all, not pink.

Sup...... rocking my saturday look, no makeup, funky hair, shades.

Although I must say that the dang thing does go fast. Look at their faces. LOL, 15 mph was a little too fast for them. After an hour, we noticed that they needed driving lessons though....cause Princess was blowing through stop signs like they were cool. We're not talking a rolling Cali stop either, full out blowing them.

All in all, they were thrilled. Dave managed once again to make the whole month.

So honey, happy Father's Day, especially since you bought your own present, hope you enjoy those scopes! :) But for the record those jeans I got you are the bomb. Much better look for you, cause the droopy rapper look is sooooooooo not you.

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I Can So See This....

So on facebook I took a "which decade fits you best" quiz. Cause I have no life.

And frankly I was super excited to get.......the 1940's!

Yeah baby, this totally works.

"You are the ultimate romantic at heart. You put a high priority on true love, patriotism, and dedication to honor and duty. Whether it be serving your country or serving your family, you have a very hard work-ethic balanced out by your whimsical, dreamy heart. You are willing to take risks, go where no one has gone before, and you have a sense of pride in everything you do. Just as you are in touch with your inner beauty, you also give just the right amount of focus on your outer beauty-- standing out with the latest fashions and getting in touch with your sensual side. Your sexiness is not scandalous but rather classy and poised. You are the envy of those around you because no matter how much tough work you have to do, you keep a smile and look good while doing it."

Now if only I could look like that, damn.......gonna stop eating and force myself to exercise.

Then buy some thigh highs.

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Several thoughts...

* Even in 3 inch heels, I'm still the shorter one of thebunch......fark!
* Proof that I can find joy even in work situations, which make me very uncomfortable
* Notice the cleavage..... as in the lack of in my case...... cause I actually heard a comment about how much of my chest was showing...... hello UTAH. Breasts are illegal.
* The only one NOT skiing at this work function, but they sent me to the spa.....which explains the great hair.
* Some of these peeps are actually the sweetest, most innocent people God ever put on this earth. I feel like I corrupt the very air they breathe.

These are a few thoughts that struck me when they finally sent around the pics from our last ski day.

And for the smart-arses who can't find me in this pic, cause:
* I'm wearing makeup
* I'm not in a hoodie
* My hair is not in a pony or a bun

I'm in the middle. The short one. With skin showing.

Is anyone hiring in the South? No ski days are a necessity.

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Don't Blink...

The Man...

Fark it, if you read my comments you'll know that The Man is Dave, as he apparently doesn't give a rat's ass about privacy issues, lol, so we'll just call him Dave, shall we?

Moving on...... Dave is home for the weekend. His one weekend this month to celebrate Father's Day weekend as well as give me my medicine therefore insuring that I don't snap and off someone in traffic.....TMI I know, but true.

So we'd planned to hike one the big mountains nearby today and enjoy some of the great Utah (snicker) outdoors. Except we woke up to Princess with swollen tonsils and an am trip to the doctor and rain. Therefore we improvised. While Dave and Princess hit the doc and the pharmacy, I ran out between rain sessions and quickly mowed the front/side yard, you know the only parts visible to the neighbors, cause it's all about keeping up appearances (does any one else love that show? ADD much?).

They came home and yelled at me for mowing in the rain and then Dave noticed that my neighbors were having a garage sale. Before I'd finished that little strip of lawn between the street and my sidewalk, he's bought the kids a go-kart for a SONG. Therefore insuring that I'll forever be that parent.......the "I'll beat you senseless if I catch you riding that thing without your helmets, padding and rollcage protection gear" parent. Fun times I tell you.

So after that debacle, we headed to the mall.

Please pause for a moment of silence......... ahhhh the mall.

Dave was sporting the droopy pants, rapper look and needed some pants that actually fit. So there you have it. Off we go.

We hooked him up. yum.

So then it happened. The moment when I stood in the middle of the mall and had a mini-heart attack. When suddenly I felt old. Dave managed it much better than I did. Turd.

As I stood with Princess in the mall watching Dave get a battery for his watch, she casually asked if we could swing by one last store. Hmmm it was nap time but I asked which store and why.....

Because she liked their shirts. Seems it's a popular brand with some of her older classmates and she "thought it'd look good with jeans and a hoodie" mom.

While doing the fish mouth face, I ran through a million reasons why that was not appropriate.

*you're too young
*it's too expensive
*blah freaking blah

But Dave in his cool parenting way, says sure we'll check it out. While giving me the keep cool eyes, as in we'll figure it out.

We walked in and once I realized that it wasn't horribly expensive and hello, the clothes are more surfer style tees and shorts than slutty clothes that most people think are okay for ten year olds. We racked up. Tee's for $12, flips for $6 and a hoodie for $14, yeah.......I'm okay with this.

But peeps, the hardest part, was watching my kid come out of that dressing room, all legs and gangly self, smiling so big and bright as she planned out outfits (need some ribbons to match for my ponytails mom)......and I realized that I wasn't prepared for this transition. I didn't think it would happen so soon, so very casually, so very.........her.

Especially when before today, all her clothes came from:

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Changing Utah, one kid at a time

Princess is finishing up basketball camp this week. So normally I drop her off on my way to work, wait till they open the doors (cause I'm not one of those parents that drop my kid and drive away while they stand outside, geez people - be good parents) then off to work I go.



Except this morning, somebody was running late (not me, I assure you...I'm never late). So the kids were stuck outside waiting. Princess jumps out of the car, leaving me waiting at the curb to go join her two new friends.



Frankly I don't mind, as hello.....some of my songs aren't kid friendly so I can jam without worrying about my influence on her growing psych. So here I am, jamming out having a good time, occassionally looking over as parents continue to drop kids off and drive around me and away......making sure that Princess is fine, even though she is only 150 feet from me.



When I noticed something not quite right......

Seems that she pulled a deck of cards out of her vest....... oh no......... surely not.........

As the crowd of girls got bigger, I realized that yes, my kid was playing Texas Hold'em with her new bestest friends..... sweet innocent little Mormon girls......

And the little blonde on the right, she folded.......

My only thought was please God, don't let her take their money, I'll never hear the end of it!

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Thank you's

A little tiny piece of the notebook I'm carrying with me these days:

"I'm thankful for..."

• friends who love me, even when I suck and don't call/email cause I'm a shit
• that my kids can wipe themselves even if they don't always flush
• Murphy eating his doggie bed, cause really I was tired of looking at that extremely comfortable looking bed sitting in the corner
• the Mexician place down the road, which saves me from cooking
• the tummy pills I have on hand that are needed after said food
• my ipod, cause it keeps me sane at work/cleaning house/yard work
• the smiles and hugs I get even my kids think they are grown
• the 4 inches of height I still have on Princess
• my mom who loves me even when I'm moody
• the gas station next to my work that provides Frasil icey drinks to keep me going throughout the work day

It's important to remember to be thankful for the little things in life......start a list peeps!

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