So this has been quite the enlightened weekend up in this mug. Besides being sick as crap, I also had my hands full with everyone home for the holidays. I do so love this family bonding time. (Not to mention, the extra dishes, laundry, and shortage of hot water ;)....
So we managed to put together the combo table which includes a pool side, an air hockey side, a ping pong side and the other side, who the hell knows. I can't figure it out.
So we've had quite the ping pong tourney going on here. It's like that scene from Forrest Gump, except much less coordinated and patriotic. I can't tell you how many breast hits I've had in the past week. Dave has a wicked backhand. Crap. I have a bruise dude!
But even better, in the height of line ref-ing with Duchess it happened. Princess snapped a perfect snap and that little plastic ping pong ball went straight........
"OH gawd you hit my ding ding"......
Oh yeah baby, she popped him a good one. After the girls crawled up off the floor gasping for air.... and I managed to pick my jaw up off the floor. I tried to recover with a nice speeach about how boys and girls have different body parts just to be informed, duh mom we know that. Unfortunately, it seems that the children now have a new nickname for male body parts. Sweet Mary mother of Jesus, my house.
Thanks to my mother, the girls already refer freely to the hoochie hoochie area and now we have ding ding. I guess I should just be happy that he's tried so hard to reform his sailor speech (ummm him, not me) so we didn't end up with something a little more lewd, crude and cough*male*cough.
But to round out the night, we were all downstairs in kid land trying to get our evening routine wrapped up. See, I help them lay out school clothes, oversee nightly lotion, teeth and etc routines then kiss them then Dave prays with them and tucks them in. Since they were babies, if we are all home this is a nightly thing. So Dave is sprawled over Prin's bed while she and I go back and forth trying to match up a cute outfit to match her new boots when she whips out a tshirt from Texas. Her idea to wear a long sleeved shirt underneath was cool, even if Dave argued that grunge was dead. But it was the shirt that was the problem. Back home there is a huge gas station with a cartoon beaver as it's character. The sayings on billboards are always "cheeky" and it's a huge joke. BUT in Idaho, having my kid wear a shirt that screams on the back "Power to the Beaver" ain't good.
She wasn't getting it, so Dave pipes up....
"A really ugly inappropriate nickname for the hoochie hoochie is beaver"
OMGAWD, I'm gonna kill him. Yeah, she's 13 now but damn really?
She thought this was hysterical and quite offensive and frankly I tried to beat his arse with a dirty sock about the head and shoulders but she finally gave up on the shirt.
So from the house of ding dings and beavers to yours.........
Happy New Year.
I can only imagine what this year will bring with a start like this!
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Ding Dings and Beavers, Lord Help Me
